#alas… it’s all snowballed <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[dawnlotus1]

I hope you know it was actually my basement no joke. We had a BITB listen party lockdown event where we fully went brain worm mode.

when did you get into jrwi?

My friends Dawn & Fawn held me at gunpoint to listen to BITB in Dawn's basement. I've been locked in there since. Let me out @dawnlotus1

[sungbeams]

RED LIGHT, GREEN LIGHT — psh

sending your boyfriend an innocent selfie after a long and tiring day quickly snowballs into something far from innocent...

⟡ ┆ pairing. park sunghoon x fem!reader

⟡ ┆ genre and tropes. MDNI 18+ ONLY, smut, established relationship, idol!AU (for sunghoon, y/n unspecified)

⟡ ┆ content warnings. guided + mutual masturbation, phone sex, edging, dirty talk, a tiny bit of voyeurism?

⟡ ┆ word count. 9.7k

⟡ ┆ note. first full length fic on this account !! biggest thank you to @jayparked for reading over this and listening to me complain about this fic <3

Silence greets you as you open the door to your apartment, quickly toeing off your shoes and limping into your living room just to let yourself fall onto your couch with a sigh. Your head falls backwards, leaning against the backrest, and you maneuver your feet to rest on top of the coffee table in front of you, stretching out your aching muscles with a relieved exhale. Rhythmic and consistent ticking interrupts the quietness around — coming from the clock hanging above your bookshelves — and even as you try to fight it, your eyes flutter close in an hopeless attempt to find at least a bit of relaxation.

Today had been stressful. And that's bordering on being an understatement.

Within the first hour of arriving at work, you had somehow managed to spill coffee on yourself. And even though it wasn’t that big of a stain — in fact, it was barely even noticeable unless you knew it was there — it still bothered you enough to agitate you every single time you spotted the small splotch on your white blouse. As if that wasn't enough, your colleagues kept bothering you throughout the day, and, just when you thought you were finally done with your tasks for the day and could take it slow for the rest of your shift, your boss decided to unload a massive amount of work on you. Your first instinct had been to hide in a bathroom stall until your shift was over and go home, ignoring the assignments and just call in sick next week, not wanting to interact with even one more person. In the end, your inner people-pleaser won, and you had forced yourself to push through. Relieved you finished your work and excited to finally go home, especially considering you wouldn't have to go back until Monday, you stepped onto the subway train — just to find out your usual station, the one closest to your home, was closed for maintenance work for the day, running on limited service only, meaning you had to get off at the following station. And even though the walk from there only added a few minutes to your journey, it still felt like the last straw to your already crappy day — the fact that it was raining and you hadn't brought your umbrella certainly didn't help — and all you want to do now that you're home is to bury yourself beneath your blankets and forget about this whole day.

More than anything else though, you can't help but wish you'd be able to curl up in the arms of your boyfriend, maybe watch a movie with him, or just spend the evening cuddling with him while he lets you vent while his skilled fingers work out the knots in the muscles of your shoulders, something he has done several times in the past when you've been stressed. But alas, Sunghoon just so happens to be several hundred miles away from you, currently preparing for Enhypen's next stop in their Walk the Line Tour in Saitama. Luckily, they were almost done with their tour. They only had two more weekends, four concerts in two different cities, left, and then you'd get to finally wrap your arms around your boyfriend again. The urge to call him, to hear his soothing voice to help you relax, is overwhelmingly strong, but you know he's likely more than exhausted and stressed out himself. After having to deal with hours after hours of rehearsals, the last thing you want is to bother him even more by unloading your troubles on him, especially since they seem to be oh so trivial and irrelevant now that you're back home and able to get a breather.

With another sigh, you push yourself to your aching feet, resisting the urge to fall back down onto your comfortable couch and let the pillows embrace you, your joints cracking and crunching, muscles aching in protest at the movement as you drag yourself towards your bedroom to change out of your work clothes. As you open the door, you find your bed exactly the way you had hastily left it in the morning after accidentally oversleeping, the duvet hanging halfway off the bed, and — much to your annoyance — the small lamp on the right side of your bed still turned on since you seemingly had forgotten to turn it off when you were rushing to get ready to go to work, skipping about 10 steps in your usual routine to avoid being late.

Not wanting to stay much longer in your stained shirt, you quickly open the white blouse to leave it hanging off your shoulders while you pop open the button of your pants and pull down the zipper, your hips the only thing keeping them from sliding off your body and falling to the floor. With your pants undone and the cold buttons of your shirt brushing against your skin, you make your way over to your dresser to pull out one of your oversized shirts — one that your boyfriend had previously owned before you had stretched it out by wearing it to sleep or whenever you needed its warmth, the lingering smell of him bringing you comfort in the nights he wasn't able to make it home or when you fell asleep before him. You throw the shirt onto your bed before hunting down a pair of fuzzy socks to pull over your aching feet, currently bare against the cold floor since you had left your shoes by your front door immediately after coming home.

Pulling off your dirty — and smelly — clothes and putting on the fresh shirt, you sit down on the foot of your bed while letting out a deep breath, rolling your shoulders and neck, stretching your sore muscles as your nerves finally settle after your stressful day. Looking at yourself in the mirror opposite of your bed, hair disheveled and the wrinkly old shirt hanging from your body, a thought pops into your head.

Leaning back to grab your phone off the bed from where you had thrown it when you initially entered the room. Swiping and tapping on the screen, the camera app opens, and you take a quick picture of your reflection in the mirror, your bare legs peeking out from underneath the oversized shirt, the washed-out material covering your entire upper body. Your hair is a mess, and you can clearly see the exhaustion written all over your face in the photo. If it were any other person, you wouldn't send them a picture like this; you'd delete it and pretend it never happened. But it's Sunghoon. Your boyfriend who has seen you at your absolute worst, whether it be ugly sobbing because of a movie or that one time you were so sick you were barely able to get out of bed. So you can't quite bring yourself to care about your looks. And as messy as you may appear, you also find yourself thinking he might appreciate it. After all, he had never made you feel like you needed to hide yourself away from him since you started dating, telling you just how gorgeous you are to him every chance he gets — whether that's after just waking up next to him or after some _intense_ time spent together.

Tapping away on your phone, you send him a message with the image attached to it:

> hope rehearsals are going well and you're doing alright. also hopefully you're having a better day than me, i'm gonna make a quick dinner and then crash i'm exhaustedddd :( talk to you later or tomorrow ily \<3

The rest of your evening passes by in a blur. A cup of instant noodles gulped down as fast as possible without choking on it or burning your mouth before you're rushing through your nighttime bathroom routine, skipping over a few steps you just can't bother to do until you're falling into bed. You don't fight the sweet embrace of sleep as it takes over you, your eyes fluttering close as your body floats away, knowing the next day — a Saturday, finally the weekend — would be less stressful and allow you to rot to your heart's desires.

[--]

The next time you open your eyes, the sun is up and light filters through your curtains. Reaching over to check the time on your phone, the screen displays several missed calls from your boyfriend from the evening before. Seeing the notifications almost instantly wakes you up, the back of your neck tingling with worry as your hands begin to shake, your mind going crazy with all the possibilities of what could've happened that would cause him to call you that many times at eleven at night. You press your phone against your ear while rubbing the remaining sleep from your eyes, anxiously listening to the repeating sound of the dial tone, the heartbeat echoing in your ears speeding up with every passing second.

After a few more rings, your boyfriend’s raspy morning voice replaces the silence of the other end of the line.

"(Y/N)? It’s…7:30 am. On a Saturday. Don’t you have the day off? Why are you up already, babe?"

Your worries instantly melt away as his voice fills your ear, his baritone sending shivers down your spine, replacing the uneasy tingling with a different, although similar, sensation. Despite only being separated for a few days, you still find yourself missing your boyfriend already, not able to help yourself even if you wanted to. Maybe it's related to your fluctuating hormone levels during your menstrual cycle or because the anniversary of your relationship is fast approaching — or just the fact that your boyfriend has been looking extra handsome recently — but you're starting to get impatient, desperately wanting to run your hands through his dark hair and over his smooth skin again.

"I fell asleep early yesterday, and I woke up just now to several missed calls from you. I was worried something happened,” you reply with the ghost of a smile tugging at your lips, not a hint of anxiety left in your body.

Sunghoon chuckles slightly over the phone, and you can hear the quiet sound of rustling in the background, most likely caused by him sitting up in his hotel bed. And indeed, just as you're imagining, several hours away from you, Sunghoon is sitting upright, leaning against the headrest of the hotel room, his pillow pressed against his back, his hand reaching up to brush his messy hair out of his face. Somehow, though, it ends up even messier, sticking up from his head in all directions. Not that he particularly cares right now. No, all he really cares about is being on the phone with you, able to hear your voice at the beginning of his day.

"Well," he clears his throat, a teasing tone taking over his voice, "you sent me that selfie last night, and I wanted to have some fun with you... but I guess you had better things to do."

A smirk tugs at the corner of his lips as he lets his eyes adjust to the bright morning sun shining through the half-closed curtains, not having had the energy to get up to close them the night before.

A laugh erupts from you as you mentally picture your boyfriend sitting in the bed of his hotel room, duvet pooled around his waist and one arm slung over his bare chest as he's leaning back against the headboard with a playful pout etched onto his face. You silently sit up — your arm starting to fall asleep from the position in which you have to hold your phone against your ear — shirt slipping off your shoulder in the process as you reach up to push some of your hair out of your face.

"Yeah? What kind of fun?"

Your voice is curious, although hushed, almost as if you don’t dare to speak too loudly, even though you’re completely alone with no one to disturb. On the other end, you can hear Sunghoon hum slightly, the rumble in his chest echoing in your ear and sending the noises straight towards your core, your plush walls fluttering around nothing. Even after being with and knowing him for quite some time, little things like this — his voice after just waking up, his cheeks painted in a dusty pink, his hair a fluffy mess just asking to run your hands through it — still instantly manage to melt you into a puddle, goosebumps rising all over your skin.

"I think you know just what kind of fun I’m talking about, baby,“ Sunghoon lightly growls into your ear, pushing the duvet completely off his body, pressing a hand against the growing bulge in his underwear to relieve some of the pressure, "You looked so sexy, with your hair all messy from the day, your makeup smudged, and my shirt covering your gorgeous body. Wish I could be there right now to tear it off of you; be the reason you're all messy and disheveled for me.”

A quiet whimper involuntarily slips past your lips, your boyfriend chuckling lowly into your ear in reaction. He's aware of the effect he has on you, especially that of his voice. Whenever when he would want to tease and rile you up, he'd intentionally lean closer to you, whispering into your ear, his breath brushing over your ear, and no matter how innocent or suggestive his hushed words would be, your body would always react the same: shivers wrecking your body, breath speeding up, and eyes glazing over as you gaze up at him. The thought of those memories alone causes you to shudder and press your legs together, dampness slowly forming between them and ruining your underwear.

"Let’s try something different today, alright, sweetheart?"

You clear your throat in hopes your voice wouldn’t come out as breathy as you’re anticipating, but without avail, "Like...like what?”

"I want you to lie back down. I know you just sat up a few moments ago; I heard it, but now I need you to lie back down. Can you do that for me, baby?“

Your response comes as a hum, not trusting your voice and wanting to relish in Sunghoon's commanding tone without interrupting him. Silently, you shuffle down in your bed until your head is resting on your pillow again before kicking your duvet off your legs to feel less trapped and constricted, allowing you to move freely. Your shirt rides up in the process, exposing the bare skin of your stomach, goosebumps forming on it as the cold air of your bedroom comes in contact with your hot skin.

"I saw a blog post a bit ago online; it was about this couple in a long-distance relationship, and to spice things up in their bedrooms, they tried this little game that blew their minds away. How does that sound?"

You swallow thickly despite your mouth feeling as dry as a desert, breathing out a soft 'good’ as you impatiently wait for your boyfriend to continue husking into your ear.

"It's...I'm not sure how to describe it. It's like a guided mutual masturbation game? I'll get you to fuck yourself just the way I want you to do it while you get to listen to my voice and allow me complete control over you. Let me guide you, tease you, make you pleasure yourself until you cum all over."

Unconsciously, you start rubbing your thighs together to relieve some of the pressure forming between them. One of your hands sneaks down your body, rubbing your folds over the wet spot forming on your panties as you try your hardest to swallow down the whimper forming in the back of your throat.

"Baby, I know you’re touching yourself already. Unless you want to deal with the consequences the minute I get back home, I’d suggest you move your hand away from your pussy right this moment,” your boyfriend growls through the phone, the roughness of his voice startling you, “Busy your hands by taking off your underwear for me, okay?”

"Okay… 'm sorry,“ you mumble quietly before lifting your hips off your mattress to allow you to quickly roll your panties down your legs, exposing your dripping core to the chilly air of your bedroom, the contrast of hot and cold, as well as your growing arousal, causing shivers to run down your spine, "What now?”

"Alright, it's called 'red light, green light' game. The rules are simple. When I say 'red light’ you’re not allowed to masturbate; you’re not allowed to touch yourself or do anything to pleasure yourself. You have to lie perfectly still and just listen to me touching myself and telling you all the things I wish I’d be able to do to you if I'd be home right now. And when I say 'green light’ that’s when it’s your turn to play with yourself, and I’ll have to listen. That’s when you get to touch yourself, rub your clit and finger yourself; do everything to try and make yourself cum. You understand?“

You nod your head in confirmation before realizing your boyfriend can’t see you, opening your mouth to whisper your words of confirmation into the eerie silence of your apartment, "Yes, I understand.”

"Good girl.“

You clench your eyes shut for a moment at the term of endearment falling from his lips, exhaling slowly through your nose to keep yourself from letting your fingers brush over your exposed skin. Once again, you can hear rustling on the other end of the line. An almost inaudible grunt echoes in your ear before Sunghoon begins speaking again, "We’ll go back and forth like that until I tell you to cum, alright? I want you to be honest with me if you don’t want to do this with me.”

You can’t help but chuckle slightly at your boyfriend, ever the gentleman, but also feel oddly touched by him making sure you’re comfortable with what’s about to happen between the both of you — all of this just because of an innocent selfie shared with him after a stressful day at work. Taking a deep breath, you try your best to control the shakiness of your voice, which you know will inevitably be there once you open your mouth to answer Sunghoon.

"Don’t worry about me, Hoon. I’m okay with this, and we always said we wanted to try some new stuff. I’m excited to try this with you.“

He sighs in relief at your reassurance, "And you’ll tell me if it gets too much? Or if you end up not liking it?”

You can't help but snort slightly at the way your boyfriend’s voice goes from deep and husky to soft and gentle within the blink of an eye, “Of course I will! I promise I'll let you know if I'm uncomfortable in any way. And we both know I wouldn’t be able to lie to you even if I tried.”

You both quietly laugh together for a few moments before Sunghoon clears his throat, his voice much deeper when he talks into his phone again, “Before we get started, do me a favor and put yourself on speaker phone. I'm gonna do the same so we have both our hands free, alright?”

"Okay,“ you reply with a hushed tone before taking your phone away from your ear and tapping the screen to put it on speaker.

"Ready to get started?”

His voice is louder in your room now, almost enough to convince you he’s right beside you, sitting on the edge of your bed and telling you what to do while watching you with hungry eyes, if not for the slight static sounds and rustling coming from your phone. The sad reality, however, is that he’s not in your bedroom, nowhere near you in fact, and if you were to reach out, your fingertips wouldn’t be able to brush against his hot and flushed skin like you desperately wish they would. It frustrates you, not being able to feel him on your body, but you force yourself to remember he’ll be back home soon — as a matter of fact, he'd be coming home in 10 days — and you both will get to catch up on moments missed together. Snapping back to reality, you take a deep breath, curious as to how this 'game’ Sunghoon has planned will turn out.

"Yeah, I’m ready,“ you breathe out, your fingers twitching to touch yourself, to run them down your body until you’re met with your already sopping core, but, as hard as it is, you refuse yourself and the need to do just that.

While you’re lying in your bed, desperate to touch your body, Sunghoon begins to pull down his underwear, his hard and aching cock springing free and hitting his lower abdomen. With a groan, he starts teasing himself with one finger, running it over the slit of his dick, the head red and angry after being ignored for so long already.

"Just got my cock out,” he moans slightly as his finger slowly collects droplets of his precum, ��it’s so hard for you already, desperate to be touched...Remember, it’s a red light for you at the moment, baby. You have to lie still and just listen to me as I start touching myself.”

Adding a second finger, Sunghoon slides them over the underside of his cock, running them along the prominent vein there until he reaches the base of his cock. Wrapping his fingers around his thick girth, he lets out a relieved sigh. Having his own hand around himself comes nowhere close to the amazing feeling of your hand dragging up and down his stiff length, but knowing you’re lying in your bed, wanting nothing more than to touch yourself, and having to listen to your boyfriend’s sounds of pleasure is good enough for him at this moment.

"Oh fuck, do you hear how turned I am for you, baby? So turned on, knowing you can’t do anything else but listen to me touch myself, desperate to run your fingers down your own body, huh?“

His panting fills the void of your room, your fingers burying themselves into your duvet as you try to hold back from moving even a single muscle in your body. He lets out a grunt that echoes off your walls, sending shockwaves straight to your cunt as you find yourself wishing, hoping, _needing_ for him to tell you it’s your turn to touch yourself. Your breathing speeds up as you continue listening to your boyfriend, his soft moans, his groans, his grunts. The mental picture of him laying with his cock out, his hand wrapped around himself, burns itself into your mind, and you swear you've never been so jealous of someone’s hand before.

Sunghoon groans again as he lets his thumb swipe over the head of his cock, collecting the beads of his precum, continuing to relish in the sensation, "Feels so good, stroking my hand up and down my cock. Just knowing you’re listening to me doing these things, waiting for me to tell you it’s your turn.”

Your breathy moan interrupts him, your thighs clenching in impatience, "Sunghoon, please…wanna touch myself.”

"Ah, ah. Poor thing…don’t worry, it’s gonna be your turn soon.“

Sunghoon smirks, even though he's aware you’re not able to see it. Knowing you’re desperate, _so desperate_, to touch yourself — something you usually were rather shy about when the two of you are together — turns him on even more, his cock hardening even more in his hand as he continues to stroke himself.

"You wanna touch yourself, baby?”

"Please,“ you whine, throwing your head back as your self-control is wearing thin, "please let me touch myself.”

"Okay, green light for you.“

Taking his hand off his cock takes more effort and willpower than Sunghoon would’ve ever thought and is willing to admit, but he’s instantly rewarded when he hears the relieved moan falling from your lips and echoing through his hotel room. He can’t help but thank the heavens for the fact that he doesn't have to share a room with any of the other guys, or, god forbid, a manager. On top of that, the hotel rooms thankfully happen to be soundproof, so he truly doesn't have to worry about anyone outside of these four walls hearing him, no passing staff members or hotel employees — otherwise, he knows, he would have a great deal of explaining to do or deal with some peculiar glances thrown his way and hushed whispers surrounding him for the entire length of their stay.

While your boyfriend is struggling to place his hands next to his body, restraining from touching himself, you want to immediately run your hands down your body and touch your swollen lips to relieve the tension between your legs, play with your clit and thrust your fingers into your wet cunt until you’d finally get to cum. However, Sunghoon has other plans for you.

"I know you want to touch your pussy but you need to wait a bit longer, go slow on this green light.”

"I can’t,“ you whine at him, a pout prominent on your lips as you start to get annoyed at your boyfriend for teasing you, or rather making you tease yourself, like this.

"I know you can. Don’t be a brat now; just listen to what I'm telling you to do,” Sunghoon’s voice rumbles through the speakers of your phone, and you sigh in submission, giving him the clear to continue with his instructions, “I want you to touch your body. Slowly. Close your eyes and imagine me there while you play with your breasts, tweak your nipples, pull on them until they’re all hard and perky.”

You follow his directions, your hands lightly pushing the material of your shirt over your chest, running them over the hot skin of your chest, fingers playing with the rim of your areola to tease yourself before you ghost over your nipples. Your breathing speeds up as you finally start to feel actual pleasure shooting through your body, tiny jolts setting your veins alight as you start to roll your perky buds between your fingers. Breathy moans fall from your lips as you pinch your nipples, occasionally pulling on them just to let them snap back down, the slight sting of pain only intensifying your bliss.

"Such a good girl, doing what I tell her to do. Go on, run your fingers down your body to your pussy, stroke the inside of your thighs, and over the outside of your lips all while imagining me lying on my bed with my hard cock resting on my stomach, twitching to be touched,“ Sunghoon rasps as he’s thinking about how you must look, touching your body to his voice as you’re writhing on your bed, desperate for your release already.

He knows how impatient you can get, often whining for him to go harder, faster, to stop teasing you whenever you’re together, even though he likes to take his time with you. He enjoys riling you up until you’re nothing but a whining and moaning mess underneath him, until even the smallest brush of his fingers against your swollen clit could send you over the edge, and so, with your consent, of course, he often finds himself reveling in your impatience, enjoying the desperation written on your entire body as he edges you over and over again.

You, on the other hand, want nothing more than to plunge your fingers into your dripping heat, wet enough for two of them to slip right past your lips. Your hips jerk off the mattress when your fingers first make contact with the inside of your thighs, already so sensitive just from listening to your boyfriend pleasure himself and stroke his dick.

"Can you feel yourself getting wet, baby?” Sunghoon’s voice sounds choked, almost as if it pains him not to touch himself while having to listen to your breathy moans and pants.

"Yeah…“ you whine as you slide your hand between your thighs, your fingers running over your lower lips and feeling your silky essence coat your skin, your other hand continuing to tug at your perk nipples and massage your breasts, "so wet for you.”

"Only me?“ he asks with a strained voice, his hands clenching beside his legs as he continues to listen to the little noises slipping past your lips as you run your fingers over your body, jaw tensing as he resists the urge to touch his aching cock, leaking against the taunt skin of his stomach.

You give him a desperate whine in reply as your hand bumps against your swollen clit, desperate to get some attention from your fingers as well, "Only you. Only for you, Sunghoon.”

"Go on then, baby. Go and finger yourself for me. Just one finger for now, though.“

Sighing in relief, you finally slip a finger between your legs, sliding it into your center, curling it upwards and moving it inside you as moans tumble past your parted lips, raw from biting them to try and keep quiet, not that you care about your noises anymore now.

"Feels so good, fuck, Sunghoon…please let me cum,” you beg for your boyfriend, already dreading the moment he’s going to tell you to pull your finger out of your pussy again, knowing it will inevitably happen once he hears you getting closer to your orgasm.

"You wanna cum? You wanna cum all over your greedy finger, baby?“

You whimper out in response, the tip of your finger barely grazing against that one spot inside you that your boyfriend is usually able to reach without any problems, his long fingers curving in your cunt as he brings you to the edge over and over again. You slip a second finger into your pussy, a small part of you hoping two of your fingers would come at least partially close to how his usually feel inside of you. With no avail. Dreaming about Sunghoon’s fingers only makes your thighs quiver even more, tears of frustration forming in your eyes since you know your fingers will never feel as good inside you as his do. 

"Answer me, baby,” Sunghoon’s demand snaps you out of your daydream, your fingers continuing to twist and curl inside you.

"Wanna cum…p-please, I wanna cum so badly-“

Sunghoon can tell you’re frustrated based on the choked sound cutting off the whine in your voice — and he almost feels bad for you. He knows you're usually not a fan of touching yourself without any help, his specifically, but he puts his faith in you and this little game the two of you are playing, trusting that you’ll be able to finish by just listening to him pleasure himself and his voice while his body succumbs to his carnal needs. Despite this, you’re still able to feel your walls flutter around your fingers as the heel of your palm nudges against your swollen clit, drawing a sobbed whimper from you.

"That’s too bad, baby. Red light for you now.”

You mewl in protest, wanting nothing more than to keep your fingers buried inside you until your release would finally wash over you. However, not wanting to disobey your boyfriend — and especially not wanting to deal with his punishments — you slowly pull your fingers out of yourself. Your digits are coated in your essence as you place your hands next to your body, smearing your juices onto the skin of your thigh, waiting with anticipation to hear Sunghoon’s groans resonate from the speakers of your phone.

In the bed of his hotel room all the way in Japan, Sunghoon moves his hand back to his cock, fingers wrapping around himself, slowly sliding it up his length until he reaches the top, his thumb running over the head to spread the pre-cum leaking from it over his hot skin. He groans your name at the motion, imagining it was your hand wrapped around him instead, imagining you sitting between his spread-out legs, your mouth kissing up and down his shaft, lips closing around him just for him to thrust into your wet heat while fisting your hair.

"Sunghoon,“ your whine interrupts his train of thought, his eyes flashing open to stare at the cold wooden ceiling of his room, "talk to me, please. Tell me what you’re doing.”

"That what you want?“ he rasps, continuing to stroke himself as his hips buck up to meet his fist.

"Yes, please,” your voice is small as you respond, almost as if you’re scared to admit your lewd thoughts, scared to get judged or ridiculed despite knowing your boyfriend would never do anything like that, would never make you feel like you have to hide yourself from him.

He chuckles slightly at your request, discovering a new side, a dirty side of you that you have never shown him before whenever you two have been together. He grunts as he tightens the grip around his dick, the muscles in his lower abdomen drawing taut as he feels himself inching towards his own orgasm.

"Fuck,“ he grunts as he lets his thumb slide over his slit a few times, his legs clenching at the pleasure rushing through his body, "stroking my hand over myself, wishing it was yours instead of mine. I’m thinking about all the times I’ve had your pretty lips around me, the noises coming from you as I pull on your hair to guide your head up and down my cock until you let me fill your mouth with my cum. Thinking about it dribbling past your lips, running down your chin, and making a mess of you before I fuck you into the mattress, throwing your legs over my shoulders as you scratch up my back.”

You can’t help but let your hand wander back towards your core again, running it over your swollen sex before you let two of your fingers rub small circles on your clit. You whine at the feeling, wanting to finally, finally give in to your body's pleas. However, what you forget to think about is that Sunghoon knows you; in fact, he knows almost better than you know yourself, your body, your movements — and the noises you make when he's fucking you. The moment you moan at the feeling of your fingers on your aching clit, he knows you’re touching yourself despite it not being your turn yet. His eyes snap open, his hand stills on his hardened cock as his eyebrows furrow in disbelief, not quite wanting to believe what his ears are hearing.

"Babygirl, I said red light,“ he pants after picking up his movements again, the sound of his hand stroking himself clearly audible at your end of the line, "you stop when I say so. Don’t make me punish you when I get back home.”

Your breath hitches and your fingers pause their movements. The whine falling from your lips could be described as nothing short of pathetic as you mumble out a halfhearted apology, your hands trembling as you pull them away from your wet, almost dripping, pussy. Your legs start twitching in response, your body burning at the denied orgasm, so close to the edge but not allowed to let yourself submit to the feeling just yet. You can’t help but hate yourself for giving in, weighing in the option of just taking your boyfriend’s punishment once he’s back by your side, but, in the end, you know the kind he would give you wouldn’t be just a few spankings until your ass would be raw and red. 

Oh no, knowing Sunghoon, he wouldn’t let you cum for several days until you were a begging and delirious mess for him, the only thing on your mind being him and his cock. Only then would he allow you to cum, after making sure you’d tell him — assure him while sitting on your knees with his hard cock in front of you, your hands wrapped tightly around it — that you wouldn’t disobey him again. It had happened before after all, only once, but enough to engrave it into your memory, the way your body trembled, your mind reeling at the denied orgasm, your lower lips so uncomfortably drenched you felt like you were going insane.

Sunghoon continues to stroke himself, moaning your name into his room and, once again, thanking the universe for his hotel room being soundproof as well as the fact that it was still early enough for him to be sure none of the other members would be awake right now to disturb him. His heart is beating out of his chest as he listens to your shuddering breath and soft whimpers sounding through the speakers of his phone. He can tell you’re trying your hardest to hold back, wanting nothing more than to touch yourself again, to finally rub your clit once more and make it over the finishing line, but you're keeping yourself from it in order to please him, to not make him punish you. And he absolutely loves it. Loves knowing the control he has over you even several hundred miles away from you.

"Sunghoon…please,“ you breathe out, whiney, your begs sounding like a broken record.

"Use your words, baby,” he says, his voice cracking as he tugs especially hard on his thick cock, "tell me what you want.”

"Please, p-please wanna touch myself again…“ you beg for your boyfriend, desperate to push your fingers back inside your sopping core and make yourself cum, being denied your orgasm too often already.

"Fuck, so desperate for me…you like playing with your pretty little pussy that much, huh?”

You nod despite Sunghoon not being able to see, a frail, nothing short of desperate, moan slipping past your lips. Your walls clench around nothing, begging to be filled up again, to have your fingers rub against them. Your legs twitch in anticipation, muscles tensing up, and you have to grip onto the duvet that’s pooled around your hips in order to not give in to the urge to touch your body despite it not being your turn just now. Hearing those sounds coming from you, Sunghoon can’t help but feel sorry, stilling the movements of his hand before letting out a deep sigh.

"Alright, it’s your turn again. Green light for you, but I want you to follow my lead again, okay, baby?“

"Okay. Thank you,” you sigh, your body relaxing again at the thought of you finally getting to finish.

"I want you to rub your hands over your body. Run them over your breasts, circling your fingers around your nipples, and then down your tummy to work your way towards your pussy. Now…put your fingers along the insides of your thighs and push them wide apart; are you following what I’m saying, baby?“

You moan in confirmation, your fingers running over the sensitive insides of your thighs, turning you on even more than you already are, ready to push them into your weeping hole as soon as he tells you to. Your nipples are hard and pert against the cold air inside your bedroom, desperate for your attention, which is directed towards another part of your body.

Sunghoon clears his throat before he continues, need and want turning his voice hoarse, "I want you to imagine this while you’re fucking yourself, while you’re trying to make yourself cum right now. I want you to imagine the skin of my face brushing against the insides of your legs; imagine my mouth coming closer and closer to your pussy, my hot breath fanning over your wet lips. And before you even realize it, imagine my tongue running over them, gliding from one end up to the other, drinking you in, sucking on your clit as I’m going down on you.”

You almost can’t hear him from the squelching sounds your soaked pussy makes as your fingers move inside of you. Your mind is rushing, scrambling to get your mouth to produce any other sounds besides the constant moans spilling past your lips.

"Fuck,“ you cry out, throwing your head back and straining your neck.

Your body shivers as you imagine everything he just told you, his hands all over your body, his tongue on your cunt. Arching your back off of the mattress, your walls clench around your fingers, which never stop working their way in and out of you.

"Imagine my head between your thighs, your hands tugging on my hair as I’m pushing my tongue inside you, tasting your essence in my mouth. Keep playing with yourself, baby. Keep imagining me right there with you. Bet you wish it were my fingers buried deep in your cunt instead. You’re really close, aren’t you?”

You reply with a weak moan, “Yes, please, please…”

Sunghoon knows the telltale signs of you being close to your orgasm, and even without seeing you, he can still hear the way your moans get more and more whiny, your breathing speeding up, and your vocal cords producing the most beautiful sounds as you groan out his name, causing his dick to twitch against his stomach, untouched. Just before you can feel yourself tumbling over the edge, he tells you to stop again, the two simple words spoken into the void of your room the most torturous thing he has ever done to you.

Your body listens before your mind even processes his words, your hands moving away from your dripping and clenching pussy as soon as those words leave his mouth. You throw your head back in irritation, your eyes fluttering open, tears of frustration burning behind them, your skin scorching hot as you try to calm your breathing. Pleasure slowly fades away, slipping from your grasp, and all you’re left with is a dull ache between your legs, feeling empty after you pull your fingers away from your drenched folds, your body covered in a thin layer of sweat.

Sunghoon’s chuckle sounds out of your phone in reaction to your whiny sob ripping its way from your vocal cords, “You didn’t think I’d let you get off this easy, did you? Now, you gotta listen to me again..."

He groans as he lets his hand glide up and down his cock again, his breathing quickly turning into messy panting. He tries to force himself to not go too fast, wanting to draw out his orgasm even more than he already had. Sunghoon doesn’t want to cum before getting to hear your beautiful and desperate moans again, needy whines echoing through his hotel room while you’re pleasuring yourself. No, he doesn’t want to miss out on that experience.

The thought of you lying on your bed — your body damp and sticky due to the sweat coating your skin while your hands are pressed against your sides, fingers twitching with anticipation — drives him absolutely insane. He can’t wait to come back home and reward you for doing this experiment with him, licking you up until you would be trembling underneath the slightest of his touch, just to drive you over the edge again and again.

"God, I’m so hard just from thinking about going down on you. I love it so much, eating you out, seeing your eyes roll back into your head as I wrap my lips around your swollen clit,“ a choked moan cuts him off as he throws his head back, his throat straining at the effort to keep himself from cumming, "hearing you whimper, hearing you moan my name, whining for me to make you come…”

Being able to listen to him moan like this, so desperate for his release, draws out an involuntary shudder that makes your pussy throb in anticipation and need. You clench your fingers by your side to keep yourself from running them over your trembling body, your fingernails digging into the skin of your palms.

"Fuck…Sunghoon, please. I wanna cum, please, let me touch myself again,“ you whine desperately, being denied too many times now.

Sunghoon nods on the other end of the line, not that you’re able to see it, but he groans in confirmation, "Go on, touch yourself to my moans. I want to cum together with you, fuck…rub your pretty little pussy for me, baby.”

Sighing in relief, you instantly move both of your hands down your body towards your core, slipping two digits past your wet lips while the fingers on your other hand start rubbing circles on your swollen clit. You’re past the point of wanting to build up to your orgasm, ready to let it crash over you and take you with it until you’re completely wrecked.

"God,“ he almost growls into your ear, his voice strained with effort, "I’m imagining you, laying in bed. I bet your fingers are pressing really _really_ hard and quick circles against your clit, huh?”

"Y-yes! Please, please feels so good," you babble out, your own thoughts not making any sense to you anymore.

Your panting becomes erratic, whines falling from your mouth as you feel yourself teetering on the edge. The pace of your fingers quickens, and you can’t help but let a loud moan slip past your lips, your lower one slipping out of the grasp your teeth had on it just moments ago. Your moans turn into whines and heavy breathing as your toes curl at the pleasure pricking at every nerve in your entire body. Moving your hand away from your clit, you let it ghost over your body, dragging your fingernails over your scorching skin until you reach your breasts to roll one of your nipples between your fingers.

"That's it, come on, say it now. Say it for me, baby,“ he urges you, desperate to release all over his hand, the head of his cock colored an angry red as he continues to pump himself to the pace of your breaths.

"Shit…I-I’m gonna cum,” you stutter, your voice airy and feeling lightheaded as your body threatens to get overwhelmed with desire.

"Yeah? Gonna cum all over your fingers for me, baby? Gonna cum so hard, your thighs will shake for days when you think about this? Won’t be able to walk today?“

You mewl loudly in response, your walls fluttering and twitching around your fingers, your palm rubbing against your swollen clit as your other hand grips tightly onto your breasts, tweaking and pinching your nipple, "Fuck…y-yeah...”

Your boyfriend groans at the other end in response to your noises, his breaths nearing erratic as he rushes to meet the pace of your movements with his own stroking, his hand fisting up and down his hard cock, “Cum for me, baby. Cum all over your fingers like the good girl you are for me.”

"Ah, fuck…fuck me, feels so good!“

You move your hand away from your chest, angling the fingers buried inside you so you could press quick small circles against your aching clit again, and soon enough you’re choking out a loud moan, your voice echoing off your bedroom walls as you feel yourself coming closer and closer to your release.

Your orgasm crashes over you in one big wave of heat, your back arching off your bed as your hand stills inside your pussy. Your release gushes from your core, coating parts of your trembling hand. Drool threatens to escape past your lips as your jaw slackens, the moans tumbling from your mouth come nothing short of pornographic, your orgasm too intense for you to bite them back or even attempt to contain them. 

Loud groans fill your room, joined by the wet sounds of your boyfriend pumping his cock at a mind-blowing pace, coming straight from the speakers of your phone as you hear him panting faster and faster until he grunts out, "Oh fuck, shit…I’m cumming, I-I’m cumming!”

Sunghoon desperately continues to stroke his cock as it twitches in his hands, his muscles burning with strain as they tighten all over his body. He throws his head back as his vocal cords produce the loudest groan you’ve ever heard come from your boyfriend’s throat. His chest heaves up and down as he shoots his release all over his hand and his lower abdomen, completely emptying himself onto his burning skin. He continues to lazily move his hand up and down his cock to ride out his high until sensitivity starts to settle in and he pulls his hand away from his slowly softening dick, letting out a low sigh in relief.

Slowly, his breathing starts to even out, his body relaxing; he feels his muscles loosening up, and he revels in the lightness of his body after his orgasm. The thin sheen of sweat that covers his body begins to dry on his skin, still hot and burning, and the sticky feeling makes him cringe slightly — not that he cares in this moment. Through the speakers of his phone, he can hear your breathless panting. Reaching over, he holds onto the device to press it against his ear again, wanting to have your voice echo directly into his ear.

Just as Sunghoon, your breathing starts to slow down little by little, the familiar hazy weightlessness taking over you. You almost feel as if you’re floating through the clouds, even though, at the same time, you find your body wanting nothing more than to sink deeper and deeper into your mattress until it would be swallowed wholly.

Pulling your fingers out of your ruined cunt, you can’t help but whine as you take in the mess you’ve made of the top of your duvet, “Sunghoon…I made a mess.”

"Yeah? Made a mess for me? Wanna show me?“ he teases you lightly, his voice sounding louder, which leads you to assume he has his phone in his hand again instead of carelessly tossed onto his bed.

"Mhm,” you shake your head in denial, “I’m all gross and sticky.”

"Baby, we’ve had sex before; it’s nothing new for me to see you this way. But if you don’t want to show yourself to me right now, you don’t have to. Whatever makes you the most comfortable.“

You can’t help but smile as your boyfriend’s soft and caring side pushes its way back to the forefront again, shoving his dominant side back down until the next time you'd find yourselves in a similar position — maybe when you're finally face-to-face again. He has always been caring after sex, making sure you had everything you needed and weren’t uncomfortable in any way. There have been several occasions of him carrying you towards your bathroom, sitting you down in the bathtub, and running you a hot bath before sliding right behind you, his big hands massaging your shoulders and running over your scalp to relieve any tension in your body. Some rare times, you had even fallen asleep, right there surrounded by the hot water causing your muscles to relax and your boyfriend's arms wrapped tightly around you, your eyes slipping close, and the next time you opened them, you were lying in bed next to Sunghoon, covers draped over you and his soft snores filling the silence of your bedroom.

You snap out of your memories to reach over to your bedside table, grabbing some tissues out of the box standing there to carefully wipe away the mess between your legs before taking two of the wet wipes you’re keeping there as well to sporadically clean yourself until you’d be able to muster the strength to get up and walk over to your bathroom — or would fall asleep from the exhaustion starting to settle into your bones.

"Thank you, Hoon.”

"What are you thanking me for, baby?“ he chuckles right into your ear.

"Just…this. You know how hard it is for me to cum when we’re not together, and I’ve had a really crappy day yesterday, so...I really needed this,” you explain to your boyfriend, your face heating up at the confession.

You’re truly grateful to have him in your life. Even if he often doesn’t realize it, but the smallest things he does, like making sure you’re comfortable with everything and anything he does, encouraging you whenever you are feeling down, or even just picking up a snack you mentioned running out of. All those things and so many more make you feel at home around him, wanting to keep him in your life until the day you’d die.

Sunghoon laughs slightly, and you can hear him swallow thickly before he replies, “There’s no need to thank me. I love you, and I care about you. Despite your selfie yesterday being sexy as fuck, I could tell you weren’t feeling well. That was the real reason I called you in the first place. To check up on you and cheer you up. But of course this is also a nice way to spend the morning before a busy day and the concert later tonight.”

"I love you, too,“ you reply, not quite knowing how to appropriately respond to your boyfriend's words.

"You do know I’ll have to punish you when I get back home, right? For not listening to me back there?”

You could swear you can hear the smirk on his face through your phone when he says those words, lowering his voice until it’s almost comically husky. Laughter slips past your lips, your boyfriend joining you in it as you say, through your laughs, “Sure. I’ll be looking forward to it.”

Sunghoon clears his throat on the other end of the line after both your laughter dies down before you hear some rustling and his feet patting on the floor of his hotel room, “What do you have planned today? No work, right?”

Before you get to answer, you hear the water tap turn on in the background as your boyfriend had gotten up to walk to the bathroom of his hotel room and wash his hands. Meanwhile, you are staying in bed, exhausted, and your muscles still twitching slightly from the intense pleasure you felt just moments ago. You take a few moments to reply, wanting to relish the comforting silence between the two of you.

"Not really, to be honest. I was thinking of maybe heading to the store for ice cream or snacks later and then just catching up on some shows and spending the day curled up on the couch. Do you have a lot to do today other than the concert?“ you finally answer his question, finishing your response with another question in hopes of being able to talk to Sunghoon some more before he would have to hang up to attend to his schedule for the day, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

"No, we only got soundcheck in the afternoon, and that's it,” he replies to you, turning off the running water before he dries his hands with his phone pressed between his ear and his shoulder, all while continuing to talk to you, “I think maybe two or three interviews tomorrow, but that should be it…”

"Sounds great,“ you yawn in response, reaching up to run your hand over your face in hopes of waking yourself up some more.

"Go back to sleep, baby. You deserve some rest; take it easy today, okay?” he chuckles, his voice turning even softer than before, almost as if he’s hoping to lure you to sleep with his deep baritone.

He truly hates whenever you force yourself to stay awake just to talk to him. He recalls the endless nights while he had been stuck in a different timezone, on tour in the US, preparing for concerts and countless interviews while also juggling livestreams, the late-night conversations with you, your voice slurred as you'd force yourself not to fall asleep just to be irritated and exhausted the entire following day until you'd get to hear his voice again. And even though he’s now only a few hours away, in the same timezone for a change, knowing he'll be back within less than two weeks, the memories instantly weigh down on his chest, his heart with guilt, not wanting you to neglect you and your needs just for him.

"Okay…you're right...“ your voice slightly drifts off before you ask one last question, "Sunghoon?”

He perks up, his gaze previously settled on the stark white covers of his bed, almost as if you were in the room with him and he would be able to look straight into your eyes when he looks up through his lashes. His heart drops as he’s looking at the bare wall opposite of him, despite knowing he wouldn’t have found you standing there anyway.

"Yeah?“ he replies instantly, matching your low volume with his voice to lull you further to sleep and not startle you right out of it.

"I love you,” you whisper, exhaustion finally catching up with you.

 You want to stay awake longer, want to use every possible second to talk to your boyfriend some more, but you're also aware of the fact that he hates you staying away just for his sake. You know it makes him feel guilty for not being beside you, not being able to hold you as you fall asleep, even though you have told him time and time again that you can live with the occasional distance; it’s what you signed up for after all when you started dating an idol, a member of one of the most sought-after boy groups of the moment at that.

Your eyes feel heavier and heavier as you finally give in and let sleep take over your body, dozing back off to sleep with your phone slowly slipping out of your hand.

On the other end of the line, Sunghoon knows you have fallen asleep when he hears the soft thud of your phone hitting the mattress, your soft breathing filling his ear as he smiles to himself, satisfied to not have you awake any longer and overexert yourself further. He whispers his next words, more to himself than with the intention of you hearing him.

"I love you, too. I’ll text you when I know at what time I’m gonna be coming home. Now get some sleep.“

©sungbeams — all rights reserved. i do not give permission to copy, repost, modify or translate my works.

[sfehvn]

new religion

Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7

Description: AU- Astarion is enamored by you, and while he fights it at first, he may have just found his new religion. A/N: Just a tad bit of sweet smut to be honest. This was my listen while I wrote if you were curious. Enjoy! xx Rating: M (18+ minors DNI) Word count: 2,069 Characters: soft!ascended!Astarion x fem!au!Tav

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  From the moment Astarion had seen you, he knew he had to have you. Walking through the animated city of Baldur’s Gate, your radiant smile was the first thing that had caught his eye. Flowing hair kissed your shoulders adorned with freshly plucked daisies. Your aroma was the most intoxicating scent that had graced his nose in all of his years. Your rose-tinted cheeks teased with the blood flowing beneath your flawless skin. Your eyes sparkled with wonder, reflecting the rays of the sun above. He had never been a believer in the love at first sight nonsense, yet there you were. If his undead heart could beat, he was sure it would be skipping against his ribcage. It was the only time the vampire had found himself utterly speechless. 

  For months, he watched from afar, finding excuses to go into town. Not that he had to excuse anything to anyone, but the newfound feelings were frightening, to say the least. Alas, day after day Astarion went out, whether for a drink or an unnecessary shop trip, and he would wait to get even the slightest glimpse at you. He was aware that this obsession was snowballing out of his hands as he fell harder and deeper. Hells, he had never even spoken to you. Yet he knew nearly everything there was to know. 

  He knew every other day you made your way to the apothecary to pick up medicines for your sick father, whom you cared for. He knew once every fifth day, you picnicked in the graveyard next to your mother’s grave. He knew your favorite color was yellow because it reminded you of the summers you spent with your mother before her untimely passing. You had six siblings: an older brother and five young sisters. 

  Astarion had also realized that you had a death wish, apparently. You were constantly staying out past sundown, running errands or helping neighbors. Did you even comprehend the dangers? He would often think to himself. Of course he had to follow you home to ensure you made it inside safely. You were becoming a liability to him, and quite frankly, he was terrified of how you made him feel. Just when he had decided to end this one-sided arrangement, there you were. Sat on the side of the road with tears pooling rivers down your cheeks, his body felt out of his control as he approached you.

  He stood in front of you, his words caught in his throat. You stared at him with those big doe-eyes, and his knees felt like jelly. “Are you alright?” He finally managed out. Gods, what am I doing? I should just sink my fangs into her and be done with it. It’s just bloodlust. This was something he had tried to convince himself of many times already- a lie.

  “Oh, yes.” Voice sweet and smooth, like the finest honey gold could buy. “Just this silly book.” You giggled, holding up the novel you had previously been engrossed in before Astarion had found you.

  “Right. Good.” He clears his throat in an attempt to regain his composure and still his spinning mind. “I’ll just be on my way then.” You nod, gifting that sweet smile to him. Astarion felt his legs would give out beneath him if he stayed longer, but he didn’t move an inch.

  The man intrigued you, ruby red eyes and skin pale as the snow that fell during winter. He was gorgeous. An aura of mystery surrounded him, and you were keen to discover those mysteries. “Say, you live in that big fancy manor?” You question, breaking the awkward silence that had befallen you two.

  “I do. Why?” Skepticism was palpable in his tone. 

  You disregarded his tone, and he believed it to be your naive nature. “You have the most exquisite daffodils blooming alongside your walls. I didn’t want to pick them without asking.” Your smile is sheepish, innocent. Astarion doesn’t speak, his face unreadable. “I-I enjoy putting bouquets together. I don’t mean to-” He already knew this, obviously.

  “They are yours.” Astarion can’t contain the smile that tugs the sides of his lips.

  As you two stroll to the location of said flowers, Astarion finds himself loosening up in your presence. He watches you intently, the way you move your hair from your face as you carefully pluck a few from the group. He urges you to take more.

  “Are you sure? I don’t want to be a bother. These are plenty.” You assure. In response, he crouches down next to you to help pluck the remaining flowers.

   After walking you home, Astarion ordered flowers to be planted around the grounds. With the help of just a little magic, within weeks, roses, peonies, sunflowers, and carnations bloomed healthily. You would come with a fresh serving of food, a bouquet as thanks, and collect the flowers. As naive as you were, you could recognize what Astarion was doing. The daffodils were a one-off in that area, but now flowers surrounded the entirety of his property. The rate at which they grew, too; you were aware some effort went into getting them to blossom so hastily. At every mention of a new flower, the next time you came, they were miraculously in bloom.

  This compromise had been in full swing for months when you finally questioned him about it. Astarion was on his knees as he snipped red roses from the bush, insistent on doing it himself so you didn’t prick yourself on a thorn. “Why are you doing this?” You question, a wicker basket that was already overflowing held firmly in your hands. 

  “I told you, you’ve nabbed yourself on these blasted thorns one too many times.” His reply came without a look in your direction as he continued to snip the stems.

  “That’s not what I meant.” A soft chuckle emanates from behind closed lips. He looks up at you in realization, his hands coming to a halt. Your breath catches in your throat as he stares at you wordlessly, longingly. Standing slowly, he takes a step closer to you. He drops the roses into your basket before cupping your cheeks, closing the distance between your faces. The kiss is electric. You drop the basket to your feet, arms snaking around his neck while he presses your body tightly to his, clinging to you like a prayer. His lips were a colder temperature than you expected, but they were soft and hungry. 

  That’s how Astarion ended up with you in his bed. As he eagerly ripped the pale blue dress from your body, you took note of the bouquets around his bed chamber. Every single one you had gifted to him was on display and in perfect condition. Your heart flits in your chest, eyes closing in ecstasy as wet kisses trail up the inside of your thighs. A soft moan is elicited from you as his mouth reaches your warmth, his tongue flicking teasingly along your slit. Your fingers thread into his stark white hair, instinctually tugging with every contact against your clit. Colors explode behind your eyelids from the euphoric excitement.

  He pulled away briefly, with his starving mouth against your thigh, he spoke muffled words, “I don’t think you realize how long I’ve been waiting to hear that, darling.” Your breathing quickens as you look down at him between your thighs with hooded, lustful eyes. His mouth returns to your clit and he suckles lightly, two fingers dipping into your dripping center. The sensation brings your back into an arch, aching to feel him deeper inside of you.

  The swirling motion of his tongue brings you close to the edge, your legs shaking mercilessly. Astarion’s free hand moves between his torso and your legs, holding them steady as he continues his work on your body. Just as you are about to cum, he places a final kiss on your mound before his eyes meet yours. “You’re much naughtier than I thought.” He tsked, crooning his neck at you before moving up your body.

  Your lips meet passionately, his tongue slipping effortlessly into your mouth to meet your own. He creates a gap between you as one hand holds him up, quickly removing his trousers and undergarments with his other hand. He pressed his bulge down onto your warmth, hitting your sweet spot as he grinds against you. “Do you taste how lovely you are?” He murmurs, plunging his tongue further into your mouth. You can only let out a delighted moan in response.

  Once he breaks the kiss, you press your slippery core harder against his erection. “Please fuck me.” You whimper lustfully, “Please-” Your words are cut short by the sensation of him rubbing the head of his cock against your clit, causing a delicate moan to leave your throat.

  “Fuck. You’re soaked, my darling.” He coos. As much as Astarion wanted to continue to play with your body, he needed to be buried in you as quickly as he possibly could. He slides the head of his member from your clit, pushing slowly into your welcoming embrace. He savors every sensation as he enters you. There is a momentary flicker of pain on your face as you adjust to his size, and he falters for a moment.

  “Have you done this before?” He asks quietly, pressing his forehead to yours, avoiding your throat to save himself from temptation. He cursed himself inwardly for even asking; he shouldn’t care. This woman brought a side out of him he had never met before- a softer side. The scariest part is he actually, well, liked it.

  You wavered for a second before shaking your head, confirming that he was indeed the first man to have ever been in such a position with you. The thought makes him feel feral. Such a sweet flower trusting someone like him to take your virtue; he would never admit it to anyone, but honor and pride swelled in his chest. He nodded in acknowledgment, “We’ll go slow, pet.” He reassures, hips rocking delicately into yours as he fills you with as much of him as he can manage without causing you discomfort. He lays a gentle kiss on your forehead as your pain turns into pleasure, still-shaking legs wrapping to engulf his hips.

  “A-Astarion.” His name sounded like a hymn gracing his ears from your mouth, and he wanted to devour you right there and then. It took everything in him not to plow you into the bed. His hand rests on the bedframe as he finds a comfortable rhythm, eyes never leaving your face. He wanted to soak up every reaction to his touch.

  “You drive me crazy, pet.” He grunts as his pace quickens, gripping the mahogany wood tighter at the magnetic pleasure buzzing through his body. He uses his free hand to effortlessly move you further up into a slightly seated position as his thumb once again finds your clit to draw purposeful eights over it. 

  “I-I’m- Oh my gods-” The moan is loud, music to his ears as your walls tighten around his cock.

  “That’s right. Be a good girl and cum for me.” It’s a stern demand, all to mask just how close Astarion was himself. His words push you over the edge, your body clinging to his for support as the euphoria rushes over you. Every hair on your body standing on end, you throw your head back and scream Astarion’s name thrillfully. 

  With you coming undone, he allows himself to reach fruition, his seed filling you to the brim. His hand on the frame loosens, and his head hangs, face full of gratification. He looks down at you, pulling his now-soft member from you, a satisfied sigh leaving your lips as you stretch contently, much like a cat. Your eyes were droopy, a giddy smirk on your face as you fought to keep them open. Astarion chuckles, pressing another kiss to your lips. “You can sleep, my darling. I’ll wake you in a little.”

  Astarion swore he felt the tiniest tinge of warmth in his heart at the sight of you so comfortable cuddled into his side as you dozed off. This could be a welcome change. Maybe his undead life just needed his very own light, his own sun. All he knew was that he was done fighting it. One weakness couldn’t hurt.

[so-i-did-this-thing]

Hello Nicholas!

I hope this isn't a weird question, but I saw in one of your posts that you used to be in a huge amount of debt and now you're living more comfortably- how did you manage to get out of debt? I feel like every time I start even trying to figure out where to start, it's just all too big to ever get out from under. Do you have any advice for me?

Hope you have a great day!

Hey there! Yes, from about 2007-2010 (before I transitioned), I was making less than $10k/year. I defaulted on all my credit cards, exhausted my retirement, and nearly lost my house. It sucked, and in 2024, I'm finally start to feel somewhat secure. What I learned (assuming living in the US, I also did not have student loan debt):

I had to first figure out the sources of my debt. A big chunk of it was because of bad spending habits due to mental illness (hoarding + retail therapy when I was dysphoric/depressed). Another chunk was from being in an abusive friendship. Another, from being unemployed. And the last, was general capitalism (this was during the housing crisis.)

I started working on improving myself to curb behaviors that led to debt. I started working on my hoarding. I started transition to improve my mental health (had to sell some stuff to afford HRT). It took until 2015 to ditch my abuser, alas.

I started working on new job skills. I swallowed my pride and got an office job after a failed 3-year stint at freelancing. It was shitty, but enough to take care of my income emergencies -- keeping my house out of foreclosure. I got a better job 8 months later. It also sucked and I was in it for 7 years, but eventually changed industries and that's when my career took off. Because with each new job, I've gotten better and better pay.

I started using budgeting software. YNAB is my favorite. I try to account for every single dollar I have.

I started spending smarter. Food was the expense I had the most control over. I went to the salvage grocery store (you can find non-expired stuff if you hunt) and bought the "ugly" produce 1 day away from rotting from the local markets. I actually managed to eat well once I found these grocery stores, and my food bill became a fraction of what it'd been at typical grocery stores. I do wish that I had given food pantries a shot, but I was in denial about my poverty at the time.

I sold a ton of useless crap. I got rid of a good chunk of my nerd "collectibles". I only miss a few things over a decade later.

I negotiated with my debt collectors. I managed to set up payment plans with my credit card companies, condo association, and the IRS. I also did a debt consolidation loan once I qualified and was sure I could commit to the monthly payments. It forced me to be super strict about my budget and for about 5 years I didn't buy much for myself. It sucked, but I cleared a bunch of debt that way.

I got help from my family. I was embarrassed to tell my family about my predicament, but it became impossible to hide. I got help cleaning out my hoard and my mother has gracefully given me generous cash gifts every now and then. Never enough to be life-changing, but enough to give me a mental breather.

I played the credit score game. This one seems counter-intuitive, and requires some self-control about not abusing credit cards. Many people recommend the "snowball" method for paying off cards (pay off your lowest debt asap, then go to the next one), but I went with a "credit utilization" method (bring my highest used cards down to the next utilization level, then move to other cards) so I would see immediate changes in my credit score. What is credit card utilization? It's the percentage of how much of your credit card you're using. A card with a $1,000 limit and $100 on it = 10% utilization. Your credit score changes when you cross the following thresholds: 90%, 70%, 50%, 30%, 10%. Once my credit score started going up past 400 (especially as defaults started falling away), I applied for a secured card. As I started using that better, I applied for a few more cards, then for credit line increases every 6 months. My car insurance rates were tied to my credit score, so as soon as that improved, I switched companies and saved money there.

Mistakes I made:

Being in denial that I was poor. I didn't really look for resources on how to live while in poverty. This hurt me a lot because I ended up neglecting myself out of pride, which made my situation even worse.

Payday loans. I got stuck in the payday cycle for about 8 years. I wish I had sold more stuff or asked family for money to have never needed that initial loan. Once you are in the cycle, it becomes very difficult to get out.

Not going to a food bank.

Not asking for help sooner. And not just financial help.

Not getting out of abusive situations sooner. This is hard, and I sympathize with anyone in a similar position. But if you think it's time to move on, trust your gut - don't sacrifice yourself for people who don't care about you.

Ignoring debt collectors, because I was too afraid to negotiate for a plan. The IRS was so patient with me in the end, even after defaulting twice on plans.

Not considering getting a roommate to reduce costs, or not thinking of doing more things like shared meals with my fellow poor friends. Again, denial and pride. Humility is not a bad word and I wished I had learned it sooner.

Not changing jobs sooner. Curbing my hoarding and getting a better job are responsible for about 90% of me being where I am financially today.

Getting out of debt is a marathon. It took over a decade for me, and I am *still* feeling the sting of poverty. I wish you the best of luck. Folks are welcome to tack on specific tricks and strategies -- this is just a general outline of my particular journey.

[starlightrosa]

Fizzarolli's Nerves

Summary: Fizzarolli is preparing for Mammon's yearly clown contest, and he's getting nervous, as he just has to be perfect. But all this practicing is disrupting Asmodeus's plan of relaxing with his beloved. That won't do at all.

Pairing: Fizz/Asmodeus

Word Count: 1.4k

Warnings: Tickling, Swearing, Mind-Rotting Fluff. (Author regrets nothing.)

(My very first fic! Please be nice <3)

“You’ll do it, Fizz. You’ll be fine. You need to be perfect for Mammon. Always perfect.” the imp mumbled, practicing everything he felt he needed to practice in order to win Mammon’s clown contest for the tenth time in a row. Fizz knew the elements of the contest off by heart, having won it so many times. So everything running through that little imp’s head was covered.

Balloon animals. Pie gags. Comedy section. Singing, dancing, acrobatics. You name it, Fizz practiced it. There was certainly no shortage on what Fizzarolli could do, and he had to win. He had to be perfect.

That was how Asmodeus, King of Lust and Fizz’s loving partner- er, BUSINESS partner, found him.

“What’s the difference between a snowman and a snow-woman? The snowballs! Wait, no. More energy, I need to have lots more energy. Like, twenty seven coffees kinda energy. Okay. You got this, Fizz. You got this. Try again. What’s the difference between a snow man and a snow woman? The snowballs! Hmm, still missing something. What could I do? Maybe I could juggle? Do a pose? Maybe I could hit myself in the face with a snowball? Um… ah, think, Fizz!” the jester rambled.

Ozzie yawned as he came into the living room where Fizz was, the rooster rubbing at his eyes.

“Froggie, it’s eight in the morning. Are you seriously practicing this early in the morning? Come back to bed, babe. You’re gonna be exhausted…” Asmodeus murmured, the grand lord rubbing at his eyes.

Alas, the imp did not heed Ozzie’s warning.

“Ozzie, I have to be perfect for Mammon. If I’m not perfect, then I’ll lose! And I don’t wanna lose, that just-! Ugh. It just can’t happen, okay? I need to be perfect. I need to be better than perfect! I-!”

And that was when Ozzie got on his knees and scooped Fizz off the ground, pulling his beloved into a hug. Despite initially struggling to get out, Fizz soon relaxed and sunk his head into his lover’s chest.

“Fizzie~” Ozzie coaxed, using that voice that Fizz liked to hear. Honey rich and sweet, it always comforted Fizzarolli enough to talk about what was bothering him, and it brought Ozzie some peace of mind to be able to know what was distressing his beloved imp partner.

“Ugh. Ozz, what if I’m not good enough this year? What if I don’t win?” Fizz asked. Ozzie just chuckled.

“Fizz, you’ve won for nine times straight. Ten times this year, guaranteed. And you wanna know why you win so much? Cause you got some talent about you. Plus, Mammon says he wants the best, and we all know you’re the best he’s got. And besides, if that fat Christmas tree wants something better, he just isn’t gonna find it. Plus he won’t give the others a chance, he’ll pull the strings so you win anyway, and I’ll put money on that bullshit.”

“I need to win, Oz! And I need to practice if I want to win. Can you let me go?” Fizz asked, trying to gently pry himself out of Asmodeus’s arms. The King of Lust, however, did not budge a single bit.

“Well, I would on any other day, but I am not having my Fizzie Frog being anxious as fuck. So here’s what we’re gonna do. We’re gonna go back to bed, watch a stupid rom-com, and laugh at it, spending time with each other along the way.”

“Nice thought. But maybe later, Ozzie.” Fizz murmured. And that was when Asmodeus’s grip tightened slightly.

“I don’t think I phrased it as a question, Froggie~” Asmodeus responded, the Lord of Lust’s fingers moving slightly towards Fizz’s stomach. Fizz squirmed a little in Ozzie’s arms, already knowing where this was going.

“Ozzie, don’t you fucking dare!” Fizz yelped, biting back a smile.

“Oh, but I do fucking dare, baby~ give Ozzie that tum-tum, and I’ll tickle those worries right outta ya!” he declared, his fingers finally landing as he snuck them up Fizzarolli’s jester shirt, softly poking and scratching along Fizz’s belly.

Poor Fizzarolli had no chance to resist.

“Pffffhahahaha! O-Ozziehehehe!” Fizz giggled, gently squirming side to side in his lover’s arms, trying to gently slap Asmodeus’s tickly fingers off.

“Hands to yourself, Froggie. Don’t make me get them out of the way~” Asmodeus teased.

Fizz pouted playfully even as he struggled a bit. Rough tickles made him laugh a lot, but these soft and gentle tickles were much worse sometimes if Ozzie was the one tickling Fizz.

ESPECIALLY if Ozzie was the one tickling Fizz.

Ozzie saw the playful pout and he tutted. His Fizzy, pouting at tickles? Oh, that just would not do, no sir.

Asmodeus migrated his gentle scratches down to Fizzarolli’s hips, enjoying the squeaky laughter that slipped out of his beloved’s mouth. “Aww, someone’s squeaky. Squeaky Fizzie.”

“Hahahaha!!! A-Asmodeus, it tickles! Q-Quihihit it!” Fizzarolli managed to press out, a dark black blush adorning his cheeks. Asmodeus had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop audibly cooing at how goddamn cute his boyfriend was being.

“Not until you agree to come relax with me, Froggie. Just say that you’re done practicing for the day and these tickles will stop. How ‘bout that, huh? Seems a fair deal to me.”

“B-But I can’t stop!”

“If you can’t stop, then neither do these tickles, Froggie.” Asmodeus cooed, a wicked grin on his face as his fingers slipped up to Fizz’s torso to prove a point, beginning to gently count his beloved’s ribs. “Two. Four. Six. Eight…”

Fizzarolli was lost in snorting laughter as he felt Asmodeus’s fingers lightly working his ribs.

“Ahahahaha, hehehehe! N-Not fahahahair, Ozzie! Hahahahaha!” Fizzarolli cackled, the odd snort leaving him. For Lucifer’s sake, how could one imp be this cute? Asmodeus felt his heart squeeze in adoration with every snort that came from Fizzarolli’s mouth.

“All is fair in love and laughter, Froggie.” Asmodeus shot back.

Fizzarolli threw his head back, his jester’s hat jangling as he did so. Satan’s beard, it tickled so much!

“Aah! Ah, ah! Nohohohohahaha! Ozzie, not there! Not there, plehehehease!!” Fizzarolli begged, feeling his lover’s fingers tracing at that one spot at the crook of his neck.

Ozzie only chuckled, not stopping the traces. “I’ve not even done anything yet, Fizzie Frog. You can’t be that ticklish here, surely?” he asked, though Ozzie knew much, much differently. It was one of his little rituals he did. Before they both went to bed, Ozzie would give a gentle kiss on Fizz’s neck each night. The imp was rather ticklish on his neck though, and the feeling of Fizz slamming his face into Ozzie’s chest, trying to muffle his ticklish giggles never failed to bring a smile to the Sin’s face.

“N-No, I’m nohohohot!” Fizz lied, immediately going for the defensive move. But Asmodeus was no fool when it came to his beloved partner. Ozzie knew Fizz’s tells, just as Fizzarolli knew his.

“Is that so, Froggie? Funny, I seem to remember that you can barely handle my goodnight kisses on that neck of yours. Like, all I do is this…” he explains, landing a kiss on Fizzarolli’s neck, right into the crook of his neck with an overexaggerated “MWAH!” noise, grinning wickedly. “…And you just fall about laughing!”

Fizz, as expected, burst into hysterical giggles as he kicked his robotic legs every which way, trying desperately to not kick his beloved in the face.

“O-Ozzie! Stop it, hahaha! Stop it, that tickles, Ozzie!” Fizz cried out, a wide smile betraying his true feelings.

Then Asmodeus decided to get a little bit mean. He gently held Fizz against his chest and nuzzled the crook of his imp partner’s neck… before blowing a soft raspberry into the crook. Fizz absolutely squealed.

“EEEEEEEEK! HAHAHA, AAAH HAHAHA! SHIT, HAHA! OKAY, OZZIE, OKAY!” the ticklish little imp shrieked, going limp in Asmodeus’s arms. And that was when Ozzie knew he’d had enough.

“Thought as much, babe.” Asmodeus smirked, finally switching the mood from playful to cuddly as he stopped the tickles, his fingers softly scratching the top of Fizzarolli’s head. The imp melted under his touch as Ozzie walked back to their shared bedroom, the doors closing behind them.

Asmodeus settled Fizz under the covers with him. And soon the pair drifted off, smiles on both of their faces as the sounds of that dumb rom-com in question, Pretty Woman, played in the background forgotten by them both.

Finito! Hope you enjoyed this one :)

[4channerguy]

let loose / kunidazai

hayyyy so im just gonna repost this from my ao3 because ive been lacking in tumblr posts lol!! i hope you enjoy :3 xoxo (。・∀・)ノ i used this prompt when writing this: person B tossing snowballs at person A's window, not knowing the window is open and has no screen. also this is probably ooc but idgaf! and also kind of cringe but i also dgaf!

wc: 1057

warnings ✎ : boyfaliures (´･ω･`)  ➜ ┊ pairings: dazai x kunikida

𓂃 ☆ ⋮ doppo kunikida thinks of himself as a precise and sharp man.

he gets a full seven hours of sleep with no distractions, eating a full breakfast precisely at 6 AM, and then meditating. today was his free day off, and all he could think about was doing work. he’d offered fukuzawa to do more paperwork, to discard the load that was on the old man’s shoulders, but he at first declined saying, “you shouldn’t do too much. this day is possibly your only day off.” kunikida only shook his head, pulling his notebook and pointing at it. “i must follow my ideals, sir,” he said firmly. “i must retain the quota of doing seventy-two pages of work.” fukuzawa stared at him for a moment before sighing slightly. He opened his drawer to obtain a tuna can from his secret-stray-cat-stash (SSCS), because it was his free day too. The man didn’t even bother to protest against the golden-blond, and only wished him luck in his assignments.

now at his apartment, kunikida was prepared. he had a neat stack of paperwork with his laptop and of course, his notebook. he adjusted his glasses while gazing out the window. it had snowed last night, with inches of thick snow covering the pathway. since his desk faced the window, decided to open it to at least have some cool breeze in while he worked. it would give me some form of productivity, he thought while also fully opening the window screen as well. He sighed contently, opening his laptop and started typing.

unbeknownst to him, a troublemaker was walking by.

osamu dazai, who just had a typical failed suicide attempt, was mopeing around like a teenager on a winter break, tossing his empty can of tomato juice around his hands. he was thinking about what he wanted for dinner. canned crab probably. with cheap beer. ten cans of beer, maybe. he whistled to himself and then stopped.

he saw kunikida. But, alas, kunikida did not see him. dazai felt his heart skip slightly, seeing him with a furrowed brow working diligently. His glasses were perched on top of his head, which made dazai slightly swoon-

nah. dazai thought. maybe my body is just wired to tease and bother the shit out of him. typical dazai-centric thoughts. dazai crept up towards kunikida’s apartment and started to slowly form a snowball (with his bare hands of course, because he hoped to also catch hypothermia). “KUNIIIIIKIDAAAAAAA!” dazai yelled, which caused kunikida to snap up his head to see the perpetrator. unfortunately, the snowball hit him.

square in the face.

the snowball slowly dripped from his face and onto his desk. dazai only grinned.

“...”

“...surprise?”

kunikida slowly got out of his chair, grabbed his coat, scarf and gloves, put on his snow boots and walked calmly outside where dazai was waiting with a cheshire-like smirk. he took and breath and screamed, “DAAAAAAZAAAAAAIIIII!” he started forming half-assed snowballs and started pelting dazai with him. dazai, on the other hand, was laughing maniacally like a person high on drugs, with a grin reaching his ears. the snow-covered ground became a battle-ground, the two engaging into a chaotic snowball fight. kunikida’s annoyance gradually turned into amusement as he threw, turning uncharacteristically carefree. the two laughed like children on a playground, the chunks of snow glistening, making it look like a hallmark christmas card. to a passerby’s eye, it looked like two grown assed men who were on drugs.

as the snowball fight continued, it got more competitive. kunikida had the sudden urge to outwit dazai, and started to become strategic, hiding behind various things and even building a snow fort. He began a pattern of throwing each snowball while dazai skillfully dodged his attacks and snapped back with his own. in the midst of the laughter, they found a shared joy of letting go of their burdens (well, mostly on kunikida’s part) and embracing the lightness of the moment. kunkida’s mind shifted away from his ideals, and dazai from his future suicide attempts. they just became two individuals enjoying each other’s company in the purest form of fun. Eventually, fatigue caught up to them, leaving their laughter to only breathless chuckles, with fog coming out of their mouth. they stood facing each other covered in snow with comfortable silence. dazai’s grin turned into a warm smile, brushing snow out of his hair. kunikida did the same with his coat.

“you know, kunikida,” dazai began, still trying to get a chunk of snow on his coat. “it’s good to let loose sometimes.” kunikida nodded, cleaning his glasses. “yes, I suppose you’re right,” he paused and cleared his throat, “for once.” dazai only laughed and went towards him, making kunikida hesitant and step back a little. he brushed more snow out of kunikida’s face which caused him to slightly flush. “you’re always being so uptight,” dazai said softly. “you should loosen up more.”

“...well, um, i-”

“also I have a confession to make,” dazai said seriously, which caused kunikida to twitch, making his ears turn red. “since you were (assuming) doing work, could you do…mine?”

“what.”

“okay here me out, so, um, i was busy having-”

“a one night stand,” kunikida interrupted. “or a suicide attempt. or drinking beer and zoning out.”

“...that’s not true! i was fooling around-, no, wait, um, i mean MENTORING, atsushi for his job with kyoka-”

kunikida turned around and started walking away. “H..Hey! Wait, PLEASE KUNIKIDAAA,” dazai went on his knees. “PLEASEEE, I PROMISE I’LL-”

kunikida sighed and stared back at him, his expression unreadable. “i’ll do it for you. but you have to do something, for once.” dazai beamed and dusted off the snow on his pants. “thanks, kunikida.”

awkward silence.

“...i’ll have to get going.” kunikida said, breaking the silence. “hm? oh, yeah.” dazai replied, sort of red-faced. probably the cold. kunikida guessed. “see you tomorrow! we should do this again,” dazai grinned. kunikida nodded.

they both go to their respective apartments, both smiling (kunikida’s almost barely noticeable). kunikida arrived back, taking off his shoes and closing his window for any further cautions. he was about to start his work, but he decided to take a small break, because after all, maybe the troublemaker, osamu dazai, was right.

⋆｡𖦹 °✩ 06.09.23, do not repost or translate my content :^)

[astrorabby]

I beat Pikmin 4 with no upgrades

Over the past couple weeks or so I've been playing Pikmin 4 again. First a normal playthrough, which reminded me of how much Oatchi invalidates what the game throws at you.

So I figured, what if I didn't upgrade Oatchi at all? Then I took it a step further and decided not to upgrade my explorer, whomst I named Terri, either. [I DID have to buy the scorch guards to enter Frozen Inferno but I unequipped it right after I entered] I hardly bought any items, just a few bombs for some concrete walls, and, admittedly i had bombs to kill the Empress Bulblax in the Cavern for a King. I can't kill her properly even WITH an fully powered dog, I'll admit.

The results were disappointing. I knew the early game wouldn't be much different, but later wasn't much harder either. The only treasure past a pup tunnel is early on and only has a weight of 3, Oatchi's default strength. I was legitimately looking forward to, say, spending twenty minutes rushing into a 4 weight treasure over and over again to push it off a ledge, but alas no such obstacle occured.

The only parts to give me trouble were later dandori chllanges, the later night missions, and the Ancient Sirehound.

The dandori challenges were interesting, the early ones were easy sure, I platinumed the first one at least. Some, like Hefty Haulway proved quite difficult; not being able to use Oatchi to pick up some slack on that crimson banquet makes it hard to even get a bronze. Cliff-Hanger's Hold requires a lot of Oatchi's abilities to smoothly take on the upper level. Even a midly upgraded Oatchi comes in handy in Oasis of Order to immediately move the love nugget behind the start to get some extra whites, or to get the poison bulborb and/or the foolish fruit across that small creek, freeing up the wingeds to get the materials ASAP.

Speaking of whites, I actually used White Pikmin in more than one spot. I typically buy the poison armor for Oatchi ASAP, making whites very redundant, and with the onion confined to a special challenge unlocked after beating another special challenge, I often don't want to risk my white min. Since I never got the poison armor, I had no choice but to use the whities liberally; I was still very careful with them. Often restarting a whole floor upon losing just one.

The Night Missions weren't too kind. The early ones were fine and really no different, but the two in the Primordial Thicket were tough. Particularly the very final one, Autumnal Gully. Oatchi cannot glowmob, and with no upgrades, his rush doesn't stun. And you can't leave Oatchi alone for long, he will still autoattack, and with no armor or HP upgrades he dies near instantly upon a lumiknoll attack. Plus, one of the progg eggs seems to be inaccessible so I'd have to take on that progg no matter what. I resolved to collecting as many pellets as I could, getting to about 70 glow pikmin, leaving Oatchi on the blue lumiknoll and Terri on the orange. Terri being on the orange was imperitive to stun the baldy long-legs that approaches it. With plenty of spicy-spray it turned out not so bad, but it took way more concious planning than any night mission did with upgrades.

Then came the Ancient Sirehound. As I always do, I abused glow pikmin for this fight; glowies for the hazards, purps for the tail. The ice phase always give me trouble, trying to run to his tail with those snowballs rolling is a pain. But the breath wasn't a problem, until now. Get rolled into the breath and your pikmin are frozen, Oatchi is frozen, you're…not frozen. It does enough damage to kill an unupgraded explorer in one hit. Oatchi just barely survives.

The electric phase is a lot tougher, you can't just mosey on through the beams, you gotta dodge and jump them while making sure your glow pikmin go where you want, which with targeting isn't usually a problem until it randomly auto-targets the Sirehound, but many people have [rightfully] griped about the auto-target in this game so I'll spare you.

Fire phase was pretty normal. Even with the scorch guard i'd instinctively jump over the waves of fire…only this time it matters if I miss. But that didn't happen much.

Progg phase is always frustrating. The lack of HP and armor upgrades doesn't make a difference, sure you die in fewer hits but touching that stuff always kills so many pikmin its basically always a reset, anyway.

I didn't platinum the dandori challenges. I may attempt to but it may not be possible for some. Oatchi throating the banquet in Hefty Haulway seemed imperative for that one when I platinumed it, for instance. I didn't do the Sage Leaf because it's impossible to avoid Moss upgrades in the shipwreck tale, though I may do it for the sake of it. Who knows, maybe I'll find a way to do the shipwreck tale without even discovering Moss.

[froot-batty]

hi froot! I just want to say I’m fascinated by you you’re amazing ! Wanted to ask if it’s alright how you approach your stories ? How do you lay it all down or how do you meet it in the middle? Have a nice day!

Hi Nahla!! You're amazing too !! I like being fascinating, I feel like a strange bug under a microscope

I wish I could explain it better, but honestly? A lot of the stuff I come up with is just from daydreaming or pieces of stuff I've found interesting in other pieces of media that I decided to yoink. It's what I've done for a lot of my stories, OCs or otherwise. How I usually do it is think VERY HARD about the parts that interest me the most, and then if I make it a full-fledged thing then I force myself to plan out all of the boring bits (but usually it doesn't reach that stage)

In the context of this blog, it's a little easier, since I can piggyback off of canon storylines within DC. Most of the ideas for here come from a desire to explore stuff the COWARDS at DC won't. I'll use a story I've been cooking up as a (vague) example

There's a character I think could be more of a threat than they usually are? Easy, I'll make them a threat to Gotham. Oh, I need characters that get rid of that threat? Okay, I'll throw this guy in - oh, and I can make it homoerotic too? Hell yeah baby. Then it just snowballs from that one silly idea into an actual story plot and I become at it's mercy

Unfortunately that's all I got though </3. I wish I had an actually cool process but alas I'm at the whim of what my ADHD brain spawns

[handelplayssims]

Now we’re just vibing until the library “opens” at 9:00. I glanced at the google at that is about the time they open up! Sent Ian to birdwatch and Derek to write a little.

Annnd this is why I sent Ian to the birds. High singing ability means we can sing with them! Beautiful! Anyway, it’s time to pop over to the library in Britechester. It’s where Derek wants to go and Ian needs to meet someone in another location for his aspiration. Also I suddenly remembered I could have Ian introduce people to Derek. Because he would if there were traits in common. (It’d be the only way he’d make friends) Anyway, Ian’s going home while Derek’s going to work on his novel. ...or the computer could break down. That too. Anyway now I’m just going to stare at the person hogging the one computer remaining.

Staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare. I’ll give it until 4PM until I go home ..IT BROKE DOWN AS WELL. BASTARD GAME! To home with us!

Paying bills and...3 thousand. YEESH. These men need pensions or something! The grip of mortgage payments looms over us all. -sees fox rushing towards the coop- NO! Go away! I’ve got a chick to hatch! Hopefully. Right. Ian needs to make 12 friends. Ho boy. Let’s get to work. Ohp! Wait! I was going to finish writing the book before Derek went to bed. Let’s go do that. Ian made a friend with Aubrey Shelley, a near randomized Sim I made up in an alt file and moved into Henford. Annnd his want isn’t clearing. We know what we have to do for that then. Anyway, the Creature Keeper, who is now a random sim named Barret Case (again, the starting Sim died) is out and about so befriending time! Right, after some chatter, and talking up Derek to a fellow animal lover, we head back home. Ian’s sleepy, after all! Meanwhile we finish off writing that book and send it off for Derek. Some passive income, yaaay!

Neighborhood Watch!

Brindleton Bay: The Raghavan household moved out.

Right, it’s been long enough another patch has happened. So now I have a new test file Sim to add to the world. Patricia Moss, an evil botanist. Well gardener for now but botanist is the goal. And she’s going into...Sulani. Not her first choice but we’re running low on starter lots.

Back to Moody and McMillan! Ian’s up and it’ s Love Day. Day of loooove.

Oh, Discovery Quests are a new thing. Basically tutorial for how the Sims works. I’m experienced enough to not care but I might as well do them on this file just to get the basic rewards. Anyway, Ian wants to practice a comedy routine since he’s a goofball, so let’s compose one first ...oh I evidently didn’t need to compose a routine to practice one. Welp. Ah well. Anyway, Derek’s finally awake, so let’s walk on over to the National Park for a date! ...yes I am having the two walk over there in-game as well. Gotta enjoy the scenery somehow.

Oh hey! I can have both Sims go and be playful for this date since Ian is already playful ...annnnd he’s hysterical now. God. If he dies during this date! Well we got gold for the date at least. Just some nice romantic chatting. I’m going to the restroom with Derek, (in a bush even) don’t die! No death towards eating food. Hmm, let’s have a snowball fight. That might-

And there we go.

Please Grim! It’s Love Day! Have a heart? No? Nope. Alas. I guess we’re just trudging home with a new fear of death in our hearts and much sadness. Eight days of mourning to be had. (Man mourning is overbuffed in Meaningful Stories) So we’re just going to be sad and listen to the tunes Derek likes. Or even perhaps...write! Channel that grief! Needs quest specifically calls for a nap so might as well. Let’s get back to writing then. But then!

Neighborhood Watch!

Carson Allen in the Allen household is now a Captian in the Detective career.

Book is finished and now we send it off! And get our proper sleep.

[indecisive-dizzy]

Ramble about Eddie to your heart’s content, bestie :D

I’m honestly very interested in your ideas :3

Again, don’t be scared to just ramble in my ask box, I love hearing peoples ideas

AJDKKAGAJAKAK- THANK YOU <3 <3

I'm wailing rn /pos

My AU! Disabled Eddie!! Ok so he wasn't born with his disability, it came about later.

My Current story is that he had stroke in late middle/early high school! I have done research and Yes it is possible for teens and younger to have strokes. From what I recall it can be significantly worse for them compared to adult strokes

Eddie was left with permanent complications and is disabled bc of it. He has coordination, balance, and general mobility complications among a list of other post stroke effects. I just found the word I was looking for a few days ago to describe his mobility issues, it's Ataxia!

Eddie has to deal with bouts of muscle weakness on his right side which can effect his vision. He also gets vertigo a Lot and at this point dizziness is expected every time he stands.

He uses forearm crutches when he needs extra help walking bc he does have good days where he may not need them! But for longer distances he brings them bc he's better safe than sorry. He also has cane but he doesn't use it As much.

He also has a wheelchair that he Hates. He hates having to use it. But his Really horrible days leave him unable to stand, much less walk. He wishes he could just hide it somewhere and never think about it but alas. it's important.

He dislikes the wheelchair so much bc it makes him feel useless. He is Not! I want to clarify that wheelchair users are perfectly Capable and Independent! Eddie just has an issue with overachieving and working himself too hard. He wants to be helpful and do So Much but there are some things he can't do while in his wheelchair. He was stuck in a chair for months after his stroke and it was devastating back then. He has No good memories with a wheelchair so he continues to dislike using it.

Ok putting a read more bc I am not shutting up for a While

Relationships with the neighbors! Generally the same. Barnaby doesn't chase him bc that would be mean (? I can't think of a better way to describe it)

Sally is still Sally but she's specific on her mailman hate (lmao) to make sure Eddie and everyone else knows she's not faulting him for his disability.

Hmm yeah everything else is pretty much the same. I guess everyone is also more open about offering Eddie help from time to time if he looks like he needs an extra hand. They're not persistent or anything, but if they see him struggling to carry a package or two they're more inclined to help.

I still don't know how Howdy gets his shit. Honestly If Eddie is having a crutch or chair day,, Howdy just won't get his stock unless he gets it himself. I can't think of a way for Eddie to deliver all those heavy ass boxes.

He does ask people to pick up their packages occasionally too. He tries to deliver them all himself but it's not always possible. He offers a trolley they can use.

I want to talk about angst. So this is very specific, I'll try to keep it short. growing up, Eddie lived in a four bedroom house. two downstairs master bedrooms and two upstairs normal bedrooms. Before his stroke he was upstairs, his older brother in the other room, and his older sister in the bedroom downstairs.

Afterwards he had to move downstairs. His sister Hated this. She loved her room and her private bathroom and she was very prissy about it.

This snowballed into her just,, taking all her frustrations out on Eddie. He took Her Bedroom. He's getting all the attention. Her little brother was ruining everything.

Eddie was devastated by this. He went as far as to attempt to convince his parents to let them switch rooms again. He couldn't physically walk up the stairs most days but he just wanted his big sister to not hate him anymore.

Their relationship never fully recovered. As an adult Eddie will still find ways to blame himself and feel guilty. But he just can't bring himself to talk to her.

They used to be so close. She let Eddie experiment with her makeup, they talked about fashion and boys and she helped him so so much when he was questioning his sexuality.

and then it just, fell apart. But not quietly like a loose thread but rather a house that wasn't built quite right and the screws came loose one by one.

Eddie's memory gets really fuzzy when thinking that far back. but some of those memories are burned into his mind and he wishes he could forget them like he does everything else.

[matamisin]

Ellow, new here. Just saw the character question thing so 6, 10 and 14 👀

Hi hi welcome!!! :D Thank you sm for this ask!!! <3 <3

6: Does your character have recurring themes in their dreams?

For Leilani, not quite! She's very scatter-brained, so her dreams are often like that too lol! Frequently her dreams are vivid, but very random and make not a lot of sense to her when/if she remembers them. Like, she'll be watering her crops after getting up, and suddenly remember a dream and be like "wh- what?? I remember I was eating cereal (god I haven't had that cereal in SO LONG) and I looked down and there was a really weird looking fish swimming around in it and then I tried to get it out but when I looked back down I was back in school?!? And I forgot to wear socks!! I NEED socks though but then-" and she'll keep snowballing down as more comes back to her but her poor crops are just drowning because she got lost in thought mid-water LMFAOO

10: Does your character feel more comfortable with more clothing, or with less clothing?

For a while, more clothing! This is because of self-image issues that developed in a lot of her growing up and the toxic environment in corporate Joja :( It also didn't help that the area she lived before moving to Stardew Valley had weather that was pretty mid (no severe heat or cold through the seasons). So when she has her first summer in Stardew, she basically just *cue Family Guy death pose* in the town while she was running around getting chores done ^v^''

So a worried Alex sees this happen while working the ice cream booth and he carries her into some shade and uses some ice to help cool her down. Harvey arrives a few minutes later after getting a panicked call from Alex, and when she's feeling better Alex lightly scolds Leilani like "girl why the HELL are you wearing a jacket in 100F????" but honest to Yoba she's never even experienced anything above 85F and thought the weather channel was just exaggerating and that it wouldn't be that bad ala;ksdjf;laksdj

As she spends more time in the valley, she'll grow to be more comfortable in herself and actually start to find that she likes to wear a little less clothes cause it's so free and unrestricting :D

14: Does your character remember names or faces easier?

Oh definitely faces!! In fact as she's meeting everyone so quickly she can't remember names for to save her life LMFAO but she's way too embarrassed to ask again because they remember hers. So what does she do about it? She goes as long as she can to NOT use names in conversation lol, and for a while nobody really noticed

It only really came out when the bachelors and bachelorettes planned a get-together at the saloon one night and Leilani gets a little tipsy (she is indeed a lightweight haha) and she keeps calling people by almost-right-but-not-quite-right names. And literally the others are tilting their heads at her like "huh??? what did you just call me??" but they all start to get a real good laugh out of the situation as, one by one, they start to realize that she genuinely doesn't know their names

The words spreads to outside the bachelor(ette)s group and a lot of people are playfully teasing her because it's the first thing that's really made her super flustered. They won't tell her their right names either for a while just to keep the joke running aslk;fjalksd

Of course she'll learn everyone's names eventually, but the wrong names still come out from time to time whenever she's tipsy or on some pretty strong painkillers, or something like that LMAO

[stoneheart-paramour]

did a fair bit of writing for the next chapter, not following a strict outline this time just to sorta feel out the flow a bit. it's a lil over 2k words atm, and i project it'll be on the shorter side by the time i'm done... though, that's what i thought about last chapter too, and boy i was wrong haha. getting there tho!

i'm having a better/easier time writing this one than the past two, but i'm thinking about doing a few versions of at least the second scene, specifically to play around with the order in which topics are discussed by the characters. i already went "off script" from my rough outline, but i'll try a version that follows the OG plan, and probably tinker with both options.

and then next chapter i get to write about more fucked up shit!! the reason the fic has all those horror/gore/violence tags lmaaao

it occurred to me how fucked up it would be to not only remember your own murder, but to also have the memory of someone else witnessing your murder, or anyway, your dead remains. and the funny part is, Caelus doesn't remember his death from his own POV for almost half the narrative, so the only "memory" he has of it, is from Kafka's POV. that just tickles me anyway, heh. his mind's working very, very hard to repress that memory and like... fair play, it's probably not something he'd actually choose to remember if given the option. but there is just a certain irony to him getting someone else's memory of his death before recovering his own memory of it haha.

aaanyway. i think the first scene of chapter 5 is coming out pretty fun and humorous; i enjoyed writing it. the start to a long trend of Caelus utterly baffling Aventurine at every turn because he's unhinged but like, in a sweet and kind way. 'bees are attacking the port? hm maybe i should ask that violinist to play. while the bees are attacking. and then i'll go fight the bees. yes this seems like a sane option'. also him being like, "hey how much money did you give me??" and Aventurine is so dumbfounded, like he kinda thought Caelus was being irresponsible but he assumed it was like, 'oh he knows this is a fuckton of money but he's a fool so he's taking it anyway' not... 'actually he's just a dingus'. XD

soon i'll get to write him and Topaz talking again <3 my lovely girl who i adore. i guess i'll have to pull for her some day too, get the stoneheart gang together since i already have jade and aventurine. ack both she and firefly are fire types gdi.... alas, it must be done

ahem, tangent

hoyo where the fuck is blade

so anyway, the roller coaster is about to crest its first hill i think, and thinks will be snowballing from there, both in terms of action but also character/relationship development/dynamics. gonna have some good fun revelations in the next few chapters ehehhehe; got the honey vials in chapter 6 and then the fractal flame in chapter 7 and by chapter 9 the slowburn romance begins..... (assuming these scenes actually stay within those chapters jak;lfdja oh god i might have to extend the chapter length limit for certain important exceptions for purposes of pacing lol)

[hangonimevolving]

The Horror Movie - Part 2

I actually am not a fan of horror movies. Just don't love the genre.

But, alas.... this fall, I found myself LIVING OUT a real life horror movie. No, I'm not exaggerating. And I'm gonna be honest here and say that even now, nearly 3 months later, even in my normal day to day life - every so often, I get a flash in my mind, a snapshot back to the horror movie I lived through. Photo snapshots, or short bursts of cinematic video clips, just to remind me that the world is different than it used to be. I am seeing a therapist about this (heh, here it is - I'm just gonna let it all hang out). She says I have PTSD. Like, the real thing, not just using that as a buzzword for being stressed out.

Okay, so what happened. I'm gonna tell you. Note: I am going to copy/paste this narrative from a few places, because I had to recount this story at least 3 dozen times - via text message, WhatsApp, emails, etc. to say nothing of more phone calls than I can count. So, I've written it many, many times and have it availabe to copy/paste. But I'll be adding in some info here wherever I feel is relevant.

My family has endured a living nightmare.  Around 10:30 am on Monday 10/28, my dad stepped out of his house for a morning walk in his neighborhood (normal for him).  But - as of 12:30, he hadn’t returned yet.  Dr. Spouse and I were at the grocery store on a rare/unique day off from work for him - we'd had a pleasant walk in our own neighborhood that morning, and we decided to be organized for once and go grocery shopping together b/c we had discussed some meal planning, and were getting excited about a health kick. I'd finally gotten back into running nearly ever morning for the last 6 weeks, and we were both doing well with diet and exercise.

But then, we get this call while I'm in the produce aisle, and any positivity/optimism - nay, any focus on ourselves - instantly evaporates. My dad only goes walking for about 45 mins usually, so my mom got concerned and called me to see if he’d turned up at my house or something.  Long story short - the day snowballed into a frantic search for him, with me, my mom, and Brijesh driving around our entire town looking for him.  We called the cops and they launched a full-blown Missing Persons protocol, complete with police helicopters, a K-9 unit, and a Drone Search unit, and about 10-20 deputies circulating in/around my parents’ house for most of that 24 hours.  

Note: "snowballing". That's how I summarized it in my emails to people. But here, I'm gonna elaborate. This "day snowballing" thing is a euphemism for an infinite, agonizing string of little heartbreaking and anxiety-flooded moments, each one horrifying in its own right. The first one is my initial reaction to my mom that maybe she was getting worried and worked up for nothing, and wanting to call the cops around 12:00 pm that day - okay, at that point, he had been gone from 10:30-12 noon, but perhaps he was somewhere perfectly okay and safe. At least, that's what I thought. After all, just a month before, he'd had an incident and had said he wouldn't take off on long walks like that anymore. I thought it was premature to call the cops and set into a motion a whole THING. It would leave a record, they'd be on some sort of list for senior citizen welfare checks... I didn't know for sure, but I felt like it would be a big thing and what if it was all for nothing? I wasn't convinced we needed to take that step at that point. But then, the trickle-truth started. She then admitted, they'd had a little tiff that morning and he'd taken off in a bad mood - intentionally. This IRRITATED me to no end. How immature. But, I told her, "give him a chance to make the right decision." Surely he'd learned from the other thing last month? But in the next hour or two, she shared that at home, she'd found his phone, Apple Watch, wallet with ID and all credit cards.... and that in their cash envelope they keep at home, there was only about $120 missing. Now - the light bulb was going on that he had done this intentionally. Alarm bells. It was only at this point that I told her, okay, let's call the police. My logical brain tells me, my initial hesitation to call the police was totally not an under-reaction. I didn't know all the facts initially, and even so - I was giving him the benefit of the doubt, taking his words at face-value that he wouldn't make irrational decisions about exertion. But I was wrong. We initiated the whole police thing around maybe 1:15-1:30, so we lost about an hour or so of time. Would it have made a difference? That's the part I keep circulating around.....

Another pearl in the string of anxiety of that time: Waiting at the bus stop in my car for Dey to come home from school at exactly 2 pm, and suddenly becoming aware of the whirr of helicopter blades high above my head - - throwing open the sunroof of my car to realize there is a police chopper in the sky, looking for MY DAD. Like, what.

(sidetone: it is at this point I'm gonna start peppering my blog post with weird pictures, many of which are screenshots from footage from the dash cam of my car. Weird snapshots that capture the bizarre horror movie that my mind keeps replaying)

Telling Dey to put on his seat belt, because today, instead of going home, we are going for a drive. "To where?!" he asks suspiciously, because this is not the norm for us. I am thinking on my feet, and have no plan - "UHHH, to Starbucks!" I blurt out. What?! I never go to Starbucks. But in that flash of a moment, I think - what if Dad is at Starbucks? We drive to Starbucks, but make a string of ridiculous pit stops and detours on the way, and the entire time I am convinced Dey is suspicious and on to me that something is going on - but my heart is breaking in real time and I don't know how to tell him from the driver's seat of my car that his grandfather is missing and might be dead. So we stop at Walgreens "to look for posterboard" (?!)

and we do a long and asinine "detour" to Starbucks (makes no sense based on the routing) through a nearby neighborhood "to look at Halloween decorations", and all kinds of things.

(Photo of some impressive Halloween decorations that we saw on this random drive. Random photo for this story though? yes. But it's part of the Horror Movie highlight reel that keeps playing in my mind, so I'm sharing it with you, and now you know too.)

We wind up eventually at Starbucks -but then, to my horror, I see that there are no fewer than four police squad cars outside of the Starbucks, and my heart flies into a panic. Have they found him?! Or worse, have they not? And what do I do with this child in my backseat if I'm about to get bad news?!!! I throw the car in park, put on the hazards, and tell him to stay right there because I'm gonna buy him a cake pop (?!) and then I LEAVE MY CHILD IN THE CAR while I run like a maniac into Starbucks, only to find two cops in there but no Dad.

I talk to them for a few moments, tell them who I am ("I'm the daughter of the Missing Person"... and inside, mentally to myself, "Oh my god, I'm the daughter of the Missing Person") and after a few moments hearing their plan, the places they've looked, the places they're gonna look, making sure EVERY single one of them has my personal name and phone number as well as Dr. Spouse's, and AirDropping a more recent photo of my dad to them than the one they have (HIS DRIVER'S LICENSE photo which is at least 10 years old and in which he is at least 30 pounds heavier and has dyed hair) - I get back to my abandoned child with a cake pop. He asks me what has taken so long, and again I'm just paralyzed. And right there, in the Starbucks parking lot, with a raccoon-shaped cake pop in my baby's hand, I have to find the words to tell him that I'm sorry I've been acting weird, and actually, there's something going on today.... and I tell him what has happened. And I cringe. And absurd thoughts fill my mind. Is he traumatized? Is he scared? Have I officially created a core memory for him where forevermore, cake pops will be associated with shock and grief?? It's possible.

(This photo has PRIME REAL ESTATE in the Horror Movie highlight reel. I can't stop seeing it in my mind. Literally within seconds of taking this picture, with my child holding this cake pop in his hand, I break the news to him about his grandpa's situation.... and life would never be the same. Can you hear that cracking sound? That's my heart)

This insertion of material ends with Dey and me driving back from Starbucks to our neighborhood to await Vev's return from school via the school bus, where I decide straightaway to tell him what's going on right there in the car, before weakly handing him his bag with his cake pop. Another child with cake pop trauma. I'm just sick.

*End inserted story, returning more or less to copied/pasted email*

As night fell and went to the wee AM hours and he still hadn’t turned up, we - our whole family - were preparing ourselves for bad news. Don't they always say "if you don't find them in the first 12 hours, the odds of finding them alive go down?" Or is it 24 hours? Or is it "find them during the day, because after night, it gets weird?" See, I don't watch those weird Law & Order/police/crime type dramas, so I don't know these things. Whatever. The point is, once Dr. Spouse got home from work around 5 pm, I was able to leave my house with him watching the kids, and go to my mother's house to be by her side.

I arrive to her home, to find not one, not two, but something like 6-7 squad cars in her driveway and cul-de-sac, and at least 9-10 police officers from various units and specialized departments coming/going.

(*oops, here we go, more inserting of details) Bizarre and irrational thought bubbles into my mind, a thought that makes zero sense under the circumstances - but I think to myself oh geez, they're wearing their boots in and out of the house! We are a shoes-off-in-the-house culture, it just jars me to see this. Of course, then my rational mind interjects: "WHO CARES?! THE FLOOR IS GONNA GET DIRTY, BUT YOUR DAD IS MISSING." Why are you wasting brain-space on the shoes?!" And I instantly feel sheepish, just to myself, in my mind. But then my defiant, defensive, confrontational mind goes "hey! She's only human! She's having natural reaction to seeing something out of the ordinary! Calm the fuck down, let her feel her feels!" I feel crazy. A whole internal conversation in the blink of an eye. We are weird creatures, we humans.

There are three who are standing around my mother as she sits at her breakfast table with her reading glasses on, looking over various forms they have in front of her. One officer, who happens to be a very tall, muscular African American man, is leaning against the table in his tactical vest and boots, with a giant black boxy-looking laptop open in front of him as he is typing a bunch of notes in. Several officers' walkie-talkies keep bleeping and beeping at random. I see two Caucasian or white-presenting Hispanic officers, one male, and one female, walking out of the house back to their cars and driving away - and it catches my eye at the last minute that their tactical vests say "K-9 unit" on them, and their vehicle is a large SUV with "K-9" emblazoned on the side. A late middle-aged short Hispanic officer in my mom's kitchen sees my eyes darting around and nonchalantly says "yeah, they're gonna send the units out right now with the bloodhounds to try and trace his scent. We took your dad's slippers, hope that's ok." My dad's brown, fuzzy bedroom slippers. I think to myself, what if he suddenly shows up at home and is irritated someone took his slippers. Weird thoughts again. Said officer also tells me that there is a Drone Search/Rescue unit in the air at the moment, along with the Helicopter Search Unit, and my irrational mind immediately goes "Wow, Vev would love that!" before my "shut your mouth" mind goes "whaaaat are you saying, this is terrible!" Egads, there's a whole symphony of voices up there.

The minute my mom sees me, she starts crying and I give her a hug - and immediately, I'm happy to be there for her, but I also feel it. The TRANSFER OF POWER. She had been somewhat composed and in problem-solving mode before I had arrived, but now that I'm there, I feel her tacitly hand over the torch of "HANDLING THE SITUATION," and I know that from this moment onwards, its gonna have to be me that is the spokesperson of the family, the one answering questions, the one steering the ship of whatever our next steps are going to be as a family. And, I am ready for it. I was born ready. Its fine. But also, dang.

I settle in a little, and my senses settle down into some sort of calm autopilot. I introduce myself to the officers who make it known to me that they're are from Missing Persons, and they explain what protocols have been set into place, what steps are being taken, and what the plan is going to be overnight to continue search and rescue. I tell them that I'd already seen and met some officers in town who were doing foot patrol, and they are glad to hear it. I share multiple updated pictures of my dad, I take an officer into my dad's closet in his bedroom and show him the type of clothing my dad ordinarily wears. They want to know what shirt that my dad was wearing that morning, and I don't know - and my mom doesn't either, and she's all broken up about the fact that she doesn't know. The officers (with only good intentions) ask me how come they don't have a Ring camera system installed at their house, and I have to sputter an explanation that is at once mindful of protecting my parents' feelings, while also kind of being honest with them about my own frustrations that my parents had vehemently refused my REPEATED ADVICE to do this very thing. I have to control my own frustration while answering questions like this, and its not much fun.

A detective walks me outside to the sidewalk, away from my mother, and it turns out he has to ask me some really sensitive questions and doesn't want my mother to be uncomfortable. I tell him I'm here for it, let's go - I'll answer anything you ask me. I can already tell what this is going to be about, and I am prepared to answer him without any hesitation. He asks me all the things one would wonder about in this situation. Does my father have a drug/alcohol problem? Is it possible he did, and we didn't know? Is it possible my father is having an affair? Is there another secret woman, a secret family, where he has perhaps run off to? A woman or family that would be complicit in letting him hide out there and evade discovery by the cops? Does my father owe anyone money? Is he in debt? Does he have a gambling problem? Is it possible there's someone out there who has a bone to pick with him and is holding him ransom? Does he have any other vices or secrets that would be worth considering as reasons for his disappearance? It's almost a relief to hear these questions and discuss it all with the detective, because the answers are easy. No, none of the above. My dad is a boring, cranky old man who struggles to use even basic technology. He wouldn't know how to find a mistress if a woman appeared in front of him and took his top off. He has zero debts and zero sketchy business deals going on. His problem is he is BORED and frustrated with his life, because inside his mind he feels like a much younger man who is trapped in a frail, aging body, and he's frustrated about it. And of course I feel for him. HOWEVER. He and I have always butted heads, and in recent years I have not been able to help feeling frustrated with him, because he is refusing to age gracefully, and he is taking out his own feelings on my mom and all of us, and it hasn't been much fun. He balked at retirement till it was way past the time to do so, and it got so complicated because he didn't pull the trigger on it at the time that it would have been convenient - instead, he waited till he was recovering from heart surgery, there was a global pandemic and a recession, and the real estate market got complicated. He missed the timing, in my opinion, and made it harder than it had to be. How do I say all this to the officer? DO I say it? My father has one problem, and one problem only. He is angry that he's getting old, and he thinks it's unfair. This is a man who is a doctor, and whose life work has been helping human beings with the natural problems of aging. And yet, he is acting like he thought it wouldn't happen to him. (*and oooh, sidebar - now I've officially devolved into just writing current thoughts and memories, not returning to email. I think I just have too much to say that hasn't been said)

At the precise time where I should be more soft, worried, empathetic and emotional about my family - I am feeling infuriated and my patience has run out. It's occurring to me that my dad has done this intentionally because he's just having a hard time dealing with himself, and I'm just super angry. He's putting us through the wringer because he can't get a handle on his own emotions, and I'm pissed that he's being immature and super unfair to us all. But. I can't say this. I keep it to myself.

By the way - its about 6 pm, now, and I just want to say that all this time, from the very start of like 12:15 pm - I've been in touch with my sister Rithers in Washington DC, and she's been involved in the situation the entire time by phone and text. And she's worried sick. Her husband K is worried sick. Her kids H2O and Nini come to know, and they're worried sick. My mom is worried sick. Dr. Spouse is at Threat Level Nine of anxiety. My kids are worried and also feeling my absence, because I've had to unceremoniously dump them afterschool that day, and it's outside of our norm and it just amplifies the gravity of the situation. They can feel the tension in the air, and it's super uncomfortable. This will get worse as time goes on. LOOK AT ALL THE PEOPLE THIS IS AFFECTING. I'm just building a dark storm cloud in my mind thinking of it, of all the people affected, and how his unhappiness and rash decision is now pulling so many people into a vortex of despair. And I'm balancing my calm, rational, take-charge and problem-solving personality and calm, problem-solving outer affect, with my inner fury that all of this has been caused by a Man-Baby having a Tantrum.

Anyway. Its about an hour or two of this controlled chaos of cops at my mom's house, before finally, they announce that they're all going to be leaving for the night - that certain departments are going to continue Search/Rescue overnight, but that they themselves would be resuming after sunrise in the morning. My mom and I say goodbye and shut the door, and then suddenly - it's just us. Silence. We don't even know what to say. Eventually she just goes, "let's eat dinner," and we both fix ourselves a bowl of rice and rasam and eat unceremoniously standing at the kitchen counter. I don't know if we even tasted our food. Afterwards, we get in my car, almost without talking about a plan, and start driving around. Just driving around. We go up and down the streets of her neighborhood, then out to the town center, then up/down some of the long suburban boulevards with sidewalks where people sometimes walk. We drive slowly through some strip malls, paying attention to some of the benches and bus stops in case he is resting or has fallen asleep somewhere.

We do the rounds at the three small and normally super-quiet hotels in our town, make inquiries at the concierge desks. Nothing.

We pull up to three separate (LOCKED FOR THE NIGHT) public parks, and I recall my Spartan Race training days and haul my 45-year-old, out of shape ass up and over several metal fences, and jog around in the dark with my iPhone flashlight on, hoping maybe I'll see this guy. No dice.

(I am leaving my elderly mother alone in a double-parked car outside a desolate, dark park each time I do this - which also helps my anxiety TONS. And it helps her anxiety tons to know that her beloved daughter who has left her husband and children at home is now running solo in the pitch-black night in desolate, dark parks. Lucky us.)

We go to a couple of gas stations that are still open, and talk to attendants, show his picture. But its the night shift, and anyone who was working earlier in the day is long gone now, The night shift folks are kind and promise to bring up the issue to their bosses and relief shift folks who come on after sunrise, and we thank them - but we know its all a really long shot at this point.

(Is that a random photo? Yes. Random phone number from one gas attendant, who was trying to be helpful and providing her the number of the station's general manager to see if we could get some security camera footage. Again, random picture. But it lives in my memory of the Horror Movie night, so here it is.)

By the way - I've got to pause and bring up a whole other thing here. We are alone in this. And yet, we are not alone. I don't realize it entirely in the moment, but we are not alone.

There is the Missing Persons report and press release, which begin a life of their own at this point.

I have shared the Missing Persons report and press release with a few WhatsApp groups I belong to. There is a Whatsapp group for fellow people of Indian origin who live in our suburban town, and I share it there. I share it with my mom's subdivision WhatsApp group. I share it on NextDoor. A PTA friend of mine texts me to say hi, unaware of this - and in our conversation, I say "hey, sorry, can't talk much, my family is dealing with an emergency right now," and I copy/paste the link. She flies into a panic - understandably - and asks, hey I know this is really personal and I'm sorry you're going through it, but I want to help, and I know many others do too. Do you mind if I share this? Do you trust me to share this in a way that might help your family? And I think to myself, fuck, what do I have to lose - and I give her the green light. CHIIIIIIILD - does she share it. Does she ever share it. She shares it to our entire PTA board, to the broader chat for important members of our elementary school community, and then she goes and shares it to my older child's middle school chat boards. Within about an hour of my first share - - the press release has now been read by over 6000-7000 people in my community, AT LEAST. And of course from there, likely more - people then shared to their church groups, their kids' scouting and activity groups, to their gyms, to their biking clubs, to EVERYTHING. EVERYONE KNOWS. And it is very, very overwhelming to think of that..... a part of me is cringing and dying.

But, also, a bunch of candles suddenly start flickering in the dark - - and I realize, there are total strangers out there who jump into action to try and help us. A biking club circulates my dad's picture, and every member of this 200+ member biking club is biking around town looking for him. People in my parents' subdivision each get on their Ring cameras, looking for evidence to help us - -AND ONE OF THEM FINDS a video of my dad walking down the street, and we FINALLY SEE THE FUCKING SHIRT HE WAS WEARING. We screenshot and send it to the cops, who are all excited to have a photo.

(Isn't that photo random? Random shirt from the Gap Factory Outlet website. This is the shirt my dad was wearing, that we saw on a neighbor's Ring camera footage, and then looked up on the Gap Factory Outlet website because my mom recognized it as "the shirt I bought him from the Gap Factory Outlet a few months ago!" Random photo. But again, it has a permanent place in the Horror Movie film reel).

THEN. Then, then, then. HERE they come. Here come my people. The ENTIRE board of our school PTA, my new friends, my new partners in crime. Remember the Suck Zone? The tornado that I got sucked into?! The hardest job I've ever worked for no money?! THOSE PEOPLE. The people who have been working it with me. THEY SHOW UP. EN MASSE. It is like an entire Marine Squadron metaphorically assembling on my lawn. They are suited up, in formation, READY. MANY of them - not one, not two - MANY of them - - drop everything they are doing that day, hit the pause buttons on their own lives, their jobs, their families, their kids. They GET IN THEIR CARS, and they start driving around. And they get their SPOUSES to drive around. And two of them call all the others and say "drop your kids off at our houses, we will watch them, and you go drive around, and you find Evolver’s dad." CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS SHIT. They did this for us. And a tsunami of gratitude just knocks me over, standing there in the kitchen.

One of my best friends - my closest friend in our town, and I'm gonna call her Aunt Lynchpin, b/c her name starts with L and my kids call her Aunt L - has left her husband at home with her two daughters, and is driving around nonstop looking for my dad. She has known what we've been going through the last few years, she knows the whole backstory. And she says "you are going to do WHATEVER you need to do the next few days, and we are here for you. If you call to ask me if I can help you or if you can do X, Y, or Z - I'm going to be upset. CALL ME, or show up here, and just say 'do this.' And we will do it. I am your family." I take her up on this like five thousand times over the next two days.

Last but not least - my two college besties that live out of state, Y-Clef and Bonez - we have been on the horn in our group chat on WhatsApp since long before everything devolved into a tailspin. We are all three navigating the woes of the sandwich generation right now, with aging/infirm parents, and we've been supporting each other through that for a few years now... so they were the first to know, and were a constant source of support via text throughout the day.

Anyway, back to me and mom..... after our rounds, we drive back home around 10-10:30 pm, and we both take showers and get into our pajamas. But then, we walk out to the living room, look at each other silently, and almost without discussion, go back out to the car - - and do it all over again. Driving around aimlessly, without a plan, without leads, just looking out the windows. It's very late at this point and the streets of our sleepy suburban town are empty, with zero cars. I can drive with my high-beams on for most of the time without disturbing anyone else, but it's all to no avail. No sign of my dad.

Around midnight or so, we return home. By my car's odometer, we have logged over 45 miles of driving in about 2 hours, just going back and forth within our own small town. We know we've covered everywhere there is to cover at that point that (we believe) is within walking distance, since we was on foot. Demoralized. We silently head to our beds - my mom to her room, and me in the guest bedroom where my kids frequently spend the night. I don't fall asleep though. I'm texting my sister for awhile, then Dr. Spouse for awhile... and when they both fall asleep, I call around to three or four hospitals in my area, speak to the Emergency Room staff if there have been any John Does, and then I ask to be transferred to the Morgue. No unidentified bodies. Then I spend a few hours online researching funeral homes in my area that offer cremation services. Then I start looking at flight option for my sister to fly in from DC, and for relatives and friends to fly in from New Orleans. I am preparing for a funeral. I am positive this man is dead. I create a OneNote in my phone with a list of family members that we are going to have to notify, and I put stars next to the names of people we are going to have to fly in from New Orleans, from India. I visit the URL's of several Hindu temples from Houston, Dallas, Atlanta, and I jot down email addresses and numbers. I'm going to have to fly in a priest to perform the last rites. Tomorrow is the day that I'm going to get the call that they have found my father's dead body. So I am going to have some basic information and resources at my fingertips so that in the morning, WHEN we have to deal with the next part of this - I am not caught unprepared. I am going to have to drive this bus, I am going to have to steer this ship. So I better be ready. I'm completely in command of my emotions. I don't shed a single tear. I am in battle mode. I know at some point I go to the kitchen for a glass of water, and I see a faint light from my mom's room. I glance in there - she's in her recliner chair, sleeping. She's not in her bed.

I wake up (wake up? Did I sleep?) around 5 am and decide to quietly drive back to my own house, eat breakfast, take a shower, and be a part of my children's morning routine before school. They don't know it, but this is going to be their very last morning of their lives where they believe their grandfather is alive. I should be there.

Social media has blown up overnight. WhatsApp has blown up overnight. My voicemail starts blowing up before sunrise. Hundreds of people are DMing me saying "I think I saw a guy here! I think I saw a guy there!" and 100% of it is not fruitful. Most people mean well and are trying to be supportive, but it is all taking time and energy to deal with. I am filled with a sense of dread. I author 3-4 boilerplate responses and save them on my phone, and I start copying/pasting.

Also, the police reports have gone out to all local news outlets. Again, overnight, the links have been shared across social media. Our entire community is going to know about this by 7 am, and their friends are likely going to know at school. I fire off emails to the kids' teachers, principals, and school counselors to give them the information, and I write a heartfelt, desperate paragraph at the end of each asking them to please help me shelter my children from unkind comments or any breaking news of gruesome discoveries. I haven't been emotional about anything for nearly 24 hours now, but if anything gets to me a little, it's this moment. I need help to protect my kids from what we are going to find out today, and I need to beg the help of strangers with this.

BAM. IMMEDIATELY. A phalanx of people from Dey's elementary school assemble and report for duty. It shocks and overwhelms me at their individual, and yet coordinated, responses. Dey's teacher is PHENOMENAL. She calls me, ON THE PHONE, like a human being. We talk. She is besides herself, but then at the same time, ANOTHER PERSON STEERING THE SHIP, and I am sooooo grateful to have another set of hands holding the wheel. I have 100% that she is going to Mama Bear RAGE-defend my child from any and all scariness and negativity. Then elementary school vice-principal and counselor call me on speaker. They are a FORTRESS. They all metaphorically link arms, mount up, and tell me that they are enveloping Dey with an invisible shield of love and protection, and that they've got our backs. I am verklempt for the first time.

As for Vev's school community - his principal, his school counselor, his two most trusted teachers in middle school that I've reached out to. Do I hear anything? ..... Alas. I don't. And, of course my rational brain understands. This is all relatively breaking news, and I can't expect people to drop everything and immediately come running for me. But, I confess the Mommy Heart And Mind are a little anxious, and disappointed. I would have hoped to have heard from someone, ANYONE, that they'd gotten my message and would at least give a nod of assent that they'd do whatever little thing they could to help my kid. But - my kid is not at a warm, fuzzy elementary school anymore. He's in the Lion's Den of Middle School. Aside from it being middle school, with all the coordinating social intricacies and pressures - it is also HUGE! Over 2200 students. I think it's just a lot to navigate at every level. I am worried... and apparently, to my even greater heartache, Vev is too. He has social awareness, and he's not a baby anymore. He's very in tune with his family and friend group dynamics, and he's growing up fast - he can read between lines, and he can read silences. He's been observing the events of the last day, and I KNOW he's definitely connected plenty of dots along the way.

Over breakfast, Vev quietly asks me, "are there going to be paparazzi at my school?"

......... (heart breaking emoji)

I hug him tight, and take a moment to find some words. My head is swirling. I can't even imagine how he feels. Middle school is medieval enough without having to juggle the sickness of worrying if your grandfather is alive and well, the sympathy you're feeling towards your own parents and grandma for their anxiety, plus the social anxiety of worrying if you're friends are gonna talk about this issue to you, gossip about this, tease you about it, or if you're going to forever be branded "that kid whose grandpa went missing." Jesus. I spin for a few seconds.

Then, I woman up, and have a mom-conversation with my firstborn son, where I coach him on some responses he can say, some actions he can take. I tell him that this whole experience isn't just about his grandpa - that its an experience we are all going through, and we all have the right to feel our own feelings about it, and do whatever we want to help ourselves through it. I tell him he's allowed to say whatever he wants to say in response to people - - or, he's allowed to say nothing at all if he doesn't want to talk about it. I tell him that it is perfectly okay to tell people "Thanks for your concern, but honestly I don't wanna talk about it." That's allowed. And lastly, I say that if anything gets to be too much today, TURN YOUR WATCH ON (I don't even care if it's not allowed) and call me or daddy immediately. I will pick you up.

Not much else to do after that. I had told BOTH kids before school that day that if something happened and we had an update on their grandpa, that I might get busy that day and we'd all need to adjust as a family - so to be prepared that their Aunt Lynchpin (my close friend that I mentioned above, might be picking them up from school today and having them hang out with her till I-don't-know-when. They are agreeable to this.

It's about 5 minutes before Vev has to be dropped at his school bus that it happens. So to my relief in some ways, he got to be present for this next moment that happened. He got to take off for school that day with at least some solace and answers. My phone rings - and it is my mom. She is gushing a mile a minute. Around 8:30 am that morning, on Tuesday, October 27th, my mom gets a call from a strange number.  OMG, it was him. It was my dad.  

To be continued.

[cl00udyyanan]

hello love!! could i possibly request a xiao fic? just imagine it snows for the first time in liyue for the winter season and you call on xiao to help you build a snow man (a very important task that obviously needs his help building). and he’s there trying to not enjoy it but suddenly he’s getting a snowball thrown at his head and oh no i guess he has to fight back hehe.

hope you’re having a lovely day/night <3

thank you so much for requesting this, i actually really loved making this and i tried my hardest with it! (i hope you appreciate my xiao puns i was very proud of myself for it)

melting sn0wman onlyoneof

synopsis: xiao teaches you how to build a snow man and you decide to challenge the adeptus to a snowball fight

warnings: none

characters: xiao x reader

notes:im so feeling myself abt the snow xiao pun pls praise me for it,, i loved writing this. writing tips are always appreciated!

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little snow flakes dance in the air, swaying down to cover the ground in blankets of white. the wind was livid, biting the skin with a frigid feeling. liyue harbor's winter season never sought too much snow these past few years, but you knew today was a special day when you had woke m that morning to thick snow that was blanketing the ground outside. you snatched your warmest garmets and ran outside. you had waited for this moment for so long, finally you could build a snowman!

in an open field, empty with only the winter to accompany you, with a handful of snow you dragged your hand through it. alas all you got were cold fingers and not the perfect ball you had imagined. you try to roll a ball again, but it was all futile. you weren't even outside for long and your fun was already ruined. with a huff, you turned your heel and trugded a slow path back to wangshu inn.

when you turned, a gust of strong wind rushed in your face, you raised your arms trying to block it. only rubbing in the fact you were out alone with only the wind as your company, even it was mocking you for not being able to make a snowman. the gusts energy was strong, like it was trying to get your attention. it was then that you bursted into a smile, eyes wide open with an idea. "Xiao!"

whoosh! the air became unruly, violently enveloping you in dark green it was almost suffocating. your eyes peered up and there with a tall jade spear clenched in his hand, green mask fastened on his face was xiao. his eyes quickened to find any hint of danger, ready to purge anyone who was causing you harm. all he found was you huddle over in a laughing fit. "…whats so funny?" he barked. his weapon now gone, he crossed his arms, eyebrows twitching violently. "you shouldn't call my name unless you're in danger, i don't have time for your games. you have no respect for the adepti!" he contiuned to scold you, either out of anger or embarrassment was unbeknowsts to you, but the way his pale cheeks turn baby pink said the latter. after getting him to calm a bit you directed him to your plop of pitiful snow, smiling sweetly to him you said, "i wanted you to help me build a snow man."

he snatched his head away, shaking it lightly. "do i look like i build 's-now-men'." he drew out the word snowmen with his chin still held high. "you dare call my name to ask me to play in snow, what do you take me for?"

"…i've never built one before and i don't know how," you whined, "pretty please xiao?" you're gloved hands were clasped together, eyes gleaming up at him, a little pout on your lips while you chanted little pleases over again. in all his immortal years, he'd faught demons, ungodly creatures and beasts that would tear a man to shreds in one swing, he was once a general at war, lusting for nothing else but blood. yet here he was, bested by the most vile, dangerous creature of all. your stupid puppy eyes.

"fine!" he stomped through the thick snow past you kicking your snow plop to a pulp, he leant down and collected a handful of snow from the lost pile. you watched in slight awe as he took the snowball and rolled it across the snow, rolling it in different directions as it got bigger. xiao worked the snow like he was its master, knowing the inner secrets of a perfect snowman, by the time he stopped, the snowman's bottom was the perfect size. you were never able to get it any bigger than your palm.

he coached you on the second half, battle gloves gently guiding you mitts to make another smaller ball, once the right size he plopped it ontop of the other for you. lastly the head, xiao watched a few times you trying to make the snow roll in the right direction until he finally stepped in and helped. soon you had three perfect tiers of an amazing snowman. it was a nice start, but it needed a face, xiao had asked if you had anything to decroate him, but you hadn't prepared under the impression you wouldn't even make it this far into the snow building business.

"he needs a nose and eyes..i don't have a carrot." xiao shrugged. you giggled a bit, "what about your mask? he wont need all of that if he's covering his face" you wer joking of course, but xiao summoned his anemo energy and placed the green adeptal mask on it. it was no longer a snowman, it was a snowxiao.

"awwh! it looks like you" you turned to the adeptus expecting him to snarl at your comment, or blurt something about not resepcting adepti, but his eyes were soft, lips curving into a smile admiring his new self, snowxiao. he even laughed. "…does kinda look like me." was xiao having fun? after all that complaining he was doing? you were going to get back at him while he was distracted. sneaking down you grabbed two handfuls of snow with a toothy grin. you reeled your arm back and plumeted two snow attacks straight into xiao. he yelped honey eyes glaring daggers at you with a 'what the hell' look. adter getting over his inital shock, he snatched some snow and tossed it back at you squaring you right on the cheek.

maybe a snowball fight with an immortal war general was a dumb thing to do. you were so positive you'd be catching a cold after this, but when he beamed at you so genuinly, maybe getting plummeted with some snow was worth it.

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[shunsuiken]

mdni + includes ageless & blank blogs

cw. fem!reader gives subby!albedo a blow job <3 + snowballing + overstimulation (m receiving) + public sex (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)

“y- y/n—oh! oh d- dear,” albedo shudders as your mouth does wonders with his cock. he was originally sketching the view you both were gazing at until you had this insane idea to give him a blow job while he was drawing those delicate lines on his paper. could you blame yourself? of course not! albedo just looked so adorable, brows all furrowed with a slight pout on his lips that showed how concentrated he was.

key word: was. because now you have albedo leaning against a tree, arm hugging his legs to keep him wide open while your free hand plays with his balls. you squeeze, massage and touch every inch of him. you make sure to spit on his hard tip before taking him in your mouth again and albedo can only moan, shaky pants of air leaving his lips. he holds onto the canvas that he carries around with him almost all the time, hiding his expression behind it. you don’t like that, so you stop what you’re doing and pull that canvas aside.

“can’t see you properly when you’re hiding yourself ‘bedo.” your lips are red and covered in precum. the smug expression on your face makes albedo feel so small, blond tufts of hair falling over his eyes as he stares at you with flushed cheeks. he shakes his head. “someone might see us, i think we—” his next words are muffled by his own hands as they’re turned into mewls when you begin touching him again. your lean fingers run up and down in a painfully slow motion just to savour the pleasure.

“rarely anybody comes up here anymore, it’s just you and your interest in cecelia’s that always brings you back here.” you sit up and unbutton his uniform, he can no longer stop you now, if anything his shaking fingers are helping you out.

you prod and play with his pink nipples, albedo’s hips roll into air as you divert your attention elsewhere. “y- y/n, i think—nngh!—that’s enough teasing now…” albedo’s voice is small and he looks up at you with dilated eyes you just can never seem to resist. alas, you give in to the pretty boy you call yours and grant him what he’s been waiting for.

albedo leans his head on the tree to support his weight and consciousness before he completely looses himself. his back arches when you take his cock in your mouth again, chuckling when he immediately grinds his hips into your face—watching him use your mouth for his pleasure only. you don’t mind actually, he looks hot like this and he doesn’t normally let loose either so its nice to give him the chance to embrace his desires.

the vibrations from your chuckle earn you lewd gasps and pants pouring past albedo’s lips. he curiously brings his head up, watching you wrap your lips around his length through his eyelashes. he bites his inner lip when you bob your head to the rhythm of his hips. “y/n…”

“hm?” you reply as you swirl your wet tongue around his cockhead, running across his slit that earns you the naughtiest, most needy mewl out of albedo’s throat. “o- oh, archons, y/n…” he has to purse his lips in a line to stop these embarrassing sounds from leaving his mouth but he can’t help it when you suck him so good.

albedo grips on the canvas by his side, reminding himself not to break it. but that warm coil at the bottom of his smooth tummy is testing his limits. you notice how sloppy his thrusts become, good, he’s close. your free hand that lingers on his thigh moves to his balls, squeezing and playing with the softness of it.

“mmh—o- oh! y/n please please—” you feel the liquid substance of his cum squirt into your mouth, the corner of your lip curves, watching albedo come undone in the prettiest way.

albedo’s bottom lip falls, a string of “yes”’s and pleads leave his throat like running water while his hands grip on anything to keep him from ascending into the literal heavens. you smile at his stuttered movements, tasting his cum as you milk his cock from whatever it has left.

you force his thighs to stay open despite the cry he lets out when you overstimulate him. his legs twitch beside you and it overflows your body in something you can’t really describe, it feeds your ego and it makes albedo look so cute. you quickly replace your mouth with your hand, making him whine but you quickly quiet him down with your lips.

holding his face in place, your tongue pushes his cum into his mouth, kissing him as bits of the white and creamy liquid spill messily down the corner of his lips. you can feel his hand that holds your wrist, a plead that you continue with your ministrations down there. albedo’s mind is jumbled all over the place, bolts of electricity making him jittery from head to toe.

after a while, albedo unlocks himself from the kiss, head falling tiredly on the wood of the tree he was leaning on. his eyes are closed, breathing softly as you clean him up with the cloth you brought with you in your bag—that was supposed to be used for something else but you’re not complaining about the use of it right now.

after buttoning up his uniform again, you lean over to give albedo a forehead kiss. “tired?” you giggle, folding the cloth and stuffing it in the corner of your bag.

your pretty boy only gives you a soft “mmm” in reply.

[bellafragolina]

Snug as a bug

My first Pokémon love <3 boy was I late to the party

Guzma is a self anointed bad boy. Sure, he's tough and he looks the part well, but as you'll come to find, he's actually got a ooey-gooey center. He doesn't have a gang of outcast kids because he's a mean SOB.

Not to make that reference, but it's a little like peeling away the layers of an onion. It's difficult and can make you cry (whether out of sorrow or frustration), but his center is as good as the caramelized stuff (this metaphor ran away with me, but alas it's here)

However, once you get past the metaphor, Guzma's actually a pretty fun dude. Dates aren't extravagant, but he makes sure you have a good time. Pokémon (mostly bug type) hunting, playing in the endless rain, and group activities with the grunts like paintball or mudball fights (like snowball fights, but with mud)

Speaking of the grunts, you command their respect, being their boss' partner. They fear you, but also really want your approval. They'll bombard you, wanting praise or wanting to impress you. It can get in the way of time spent alone with Guzma, or time spent alone in general, but they're harmless really. And they beam if you give them positive attention (some even call you Mom/Dad/insert preferred parental name here). It's embarrassing for them, but sweet for you.

Guzma won't admit it either (at least in public) but seeing you get along with the grunts warms his heart.

Also, Plumeria is your new best friend. She's dealt with Guzma's bullshit, and she has tricks and trades to offer. In exchange, she just wants to hang out, maybe learn a few tricks from you too. It's a chill friendship, cherish it.

Hope you like bugs, or at least don't absolutely despise them. Guzma likes bugs, and thinks they're badass. He's got a scary-looking team, but to his chagrin, they're all babies. Golisopod loves cuddles and affection, while Ariados wants to sit in your lap all the time. Masquerain will hover around you while you cook and beg for scraps while Pinsir does the same at your feet. Don't feed them, they're blackholes, and Guzma will grouch at you for it too. His team loves you, and nothing makes him softer than seeing you coo over his 'scary' bugs.

Guzma would love to battle you. He's a sore winner and a sore loser, though. He'll boast and brag if he wins, thinking he impressed you with his prowess, but he'll be real sour if he loses. Still, whichever result, he never fails to compliment your skills in that unique Guzma way of his "You're gettin' real good! Almost as good as me, heh."

Kick his ass. He deserves it.

🍓🍓🍓

Sun/Moon was my first Pokémon game. Guzma has a special place in my heart because of it. My little dumbass <3

~Renee